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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27581924">Harry Potter and the Muggle Psychologist</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/auspicious_dragon/pseuds/auspicious_dragon'>auspicious_dragon</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M, M/M, Ministry of Magic (Harry Potter), Ministry of Magic Employee Draco Malfoy, Ministry of Magic Employee Harry Potter, Ministry of Magic Employee Hermione Granger, Muggles, Psychology</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 04:01:47</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>26,948</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27581924</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/auspicious_dragon/pseuds/auspicious_dragon</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry Potter takes Hermione Granger's advice and agrees to see a Muggle psychologist who specializes in treatment of trauma. Harry's relationship with Draco Malfoy continues to evolve as Harry's therapy progresses.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter, Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>63</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Hermione Is Worried about Harry</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Hermione expresses her concerns about Harry and encourages him to see a Muggle psychologist.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“I don’t know, 'Mione,” Harry said to his best female friend, “do you really think I should see a Muggle psychologist? Whatever for?” </p><p>The two Gryffindors were sitting in Hermione’s large office in the Ministry of Magic.  After Kingsley Shacklebolt retired five months ago, Hermione had been unanimously voted in as the new Minister of Magic—the youngest person, witch or wizard, to ever hold the position.  As Harry was Head Auror for the British ministry, Hermione was now his boss.  He was intensely proud of her but at times he was not clear about whether she was talking to him as his superior or as his friend.  This was something they were both trying to work out. </p><p>Hermione looked across her desk at her childhood friend, now a handsome man in his late 20s.  Compassion for Harry welled up inside her. </p><p>“Harry, I know that many wizards and witches look down on all things Muggle,” Hermione said with a sigh.  “But the fact of the matter is that Muggles are good at a lot of things that we magical folk don’t excel at.  I should know, given that both my parents are Muggles.”</p><p>She continued, “One of the things Muggles are better at is healing psychological and emotional wounds.  Wizards and witches tend to be control freaks.  We think we can just wave a wand to solve every problem.  That doesn’t work well for emotional pain.” </p><p>“But why do you think I of all people should see a Muggle psychologist?” Harry asked.</p><p>Sensing Harry’s confusion, Hermione clarified, “I’m speaking as a friend, not as a boss now.  Your work is impeccable, always has been.  You’re a brilliant Auror and your team respects you.”  </p><p>Taking a deep breath she continued in a gentle tone, “I’m concerned for your psychological and emotional welfare.  You’ve got a long history of trauma, Harry.  Losing your parents when you were an infant, suffering years of abuse by the Dursleys, all the awful things that happened to you at Hogwarts before and during the war.  Not to mention having to deal with how people have treated you after the war—both the idolatry you despise and the even more painful vitriol directed at you for speaking up in Draco Malfoy’s defense. You have suffered more than anyone.  You know that Ron and I love you profoundly and would do anything for you, but we don’t possess the knowledge or skill to heal those deep wounds.”</p><p>Hermione’s voice softened to a whisper and she looked like she was about to cry. Harry could tell that she was thinking about the pain he had endured.  She was not only the brightest, most powerful witch he knew, but also the most compassionate. She hated seeing anyone suffer. That’s why she dedicated so much time and energy to the house-elf liberation movement and donated a large portion of her income to the Society for the Protection of Elfish Welfare (SPEW). </p><p>“But how can I see a Muggle psychologist when I won’t be able to talk about our magical world at all? As if I could say, ‘Well, you see, I’m a wizard, and there was this horribly evil wizard named Voldemort, who had these cruel followers called ‘Death Eaters,’ and I had to destroy all these horcruxes he created, but then I learned I was a horcrux myself.  And after that I died, well only a part of me died, and …”</p><p>“OK, I get your point,” Hermione said with a slight grin.</p><p>“They’d lock me up in a, what’s the Muggle term, a psych ward, no?”</p><p>“This may surprise you, Harry, but there are Muggles who know a lot about our world,” Hermione said.  “You’ve met my parents. Don’t you think they know more about spells, potions and magical creatures, not to mention the history of magic, than quite a few wizards and witches?”</p><p>“Fair point,” Harry admitted.  Mr. and Mrs. Granger were knowledgeable about all things magical.  They had worked hard to learn as much as they could about the magical world so they could better support their brilliant daughter.</p><p>“So, there are Muggle psychologists who know about magic?” he asked.</p><p>“Not many,” Hermione admitted, “but I know of at least five in London.”</p><p>Harry was flabbergasted.  “Really, five Muggle psychologists just in London?  That suggests that there may be hundreds around the world.  And, if you think about professions other than psychology, then there are probably thousands and thousands of Muggles who know about magic. I thought the Ministry has to cast obliviate spells to erase the memories of Muggles who catch a glimpse of magic.”</p><p>“You’re right that in the past we did everything we could to prevent Muggles from knowing about our world, Harry,” Hermione explained. “But that’s not really sustainable anymore.  We can’t go around obliviating everybody who sees something magical.  We’d spend all our time doing that and not getting anything else accomplished.  Besides, more and more Muggle couples are having magical children.  That makes it so much more difficult to keep everything a secret.  The Ministry’s long-term strategy now is, one, to accept that eventually Muggles will know that magic exists and not be freaked out by it, and two, to ensure that the awareness of magic and reaction to it happens in a peaceful and orderly fashion.  The process will take time.  The goal won’t be achieved in our lifetime, but I sincerely believe that it will be achieved someday. Maybe not during Rose’s, Hugo’s or Teddy’s lifetime, or even their children’s lifetime, but someday.”</p><p>Harry was surprised, to say the least. Having grown up in an abusive home with relatives who absolutely hated magic and hated him because he was a wizard, he had a hard time imagining a world in which Muggles accepted magic.  But he knew Hermione was brilliant and was playing the long game. She was a visionary and always had her eyes on the prize—a peaceful world in which everyone lived in harmony and was treated with respect.  Thinking about his friend’s vision, Harry felt love and admiration for her. Hermione was one of a kind.</p><p>“OK,” Harry began. “If I do agree to see a Muggle psychologist, what’s the next step?”</p><p>“Let me make a few inquiries,” Hermione replied. “It’s important that you connect with a psychologist who’s an expert in treating trauma.  Also someone who won’t be star-struck by you, like ‘OMG, my client is the Chosen One, the Boy Who Lived!’”</p><p>The friends shared a laugh.  “No, that wouldn’t do at all,” Harry agreed.  He added, “I haven’t agreed to this yet, mind you, but I’m not completely opposed to the idea.  I know that I do need some help.  I just need to think about it some more and to get some more information about how Muggle psychology works.”</p><p>“Fair enough,” Hermione said.  “Meanwhile I’ll do some research and get back to you.”</p><p>Harry kissed Hermione on the cheek before leaving her office.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Fluctuations in Potter's and Malfoy's Relationship</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>If one looks closely enough, one might notice that slight changes in the relationship between Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy have occurred since the end of the Second Wizarding War.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Although Harry’s relationship with Draco Malfoy had improved considerably since the end of the Second Wizarding War, no one would describe the two men as friends.  They continued to circle around each other cautiously.  While both men recognized that they were no longer bitter rivals, neither Harry nor Draco felt ready to relax his guard in the other’s presence.  It was as though each was expecting the other to shoot off a stinging hex at any moment.  They continued to address each other as “Potter” and “Malfoy,” the use of surnames not only being familiar and safe, but also reflecting the brittle nature of their relationship. </p><p>What Harry had disliked most about Draco since day one was his snooty, patrician attitude, his superiority complex.  Ever since their first meeting on the Hogwarts Express when Malfoy had sneered at Ron and insulted the Weasleys, Harry would bristle whenever Malfoy put on airs, acting like he and his family were Merlin’s gift to the wizarding world. He couldn’t imagine ever completely forgiving Malfoy for calling Hermione a Mudblood.  Hermione, who had more class and integrity in her pinky finger than all the Malfoys combined. </p><p>What Draco couldn’t abide about Harry since day one was his self-righteous attitude.  Refusing to shake Draco’s hand just because he had made a disparaging remark about the Weasels.  The Malfoys were among the wealthiest and most illustrious pureblood wizarding families and were accustomed to being admired and envied.  Of course they looked down on lower-class families like the Weasels. Of course they were better than half-bloods and mudbloods. Just because Potter was The Boy Who Lived didn’t give him the right to reject Draco Malfoy’s offer of friendship.  That scarhead should have felt honored when Draco extended his hand to him, especially since Potter wasn’t pureblood himself.  Instead, he showed Draco up in front of everybody. That was unforgiveable.</p><p>Although many years had passed since their Hogwarts days, neither Harry nor Draco could easily forget the anger and hatred they had once felt and expressed towards each other.  Their relationship immediately following the Second Wizarding War could be described as an uneasy truce. </p><p>Harry’s testimony at Draco’s trial was the beginning of a détente between the two men.  Draco was astonished when Potter had spoken up for him at his trial, pointing out that Draco was a minor during the war, as much a victim of the Dark Lord as many members of Dumbledore’s Army had been.   </p><p>“For Merlin’s sake,” Harry had argued passionately, “Mr. Draco Malfoy didn’t have a choice, did he?  If he hadn’t gone along with Voldemort, his punishment at the very least would have been witnessing his parents being tortured by the Dark Lord.  More likely Voldemort would have struck Mr. Malfoy down with the killing curse.  We also know from people who were imprisoned at Malfoy Manor during the war that Draco, I mean Mr. Malfoy, avoided hurting them to the extent possible.  That means he was an unwilling participant and just doing his best to survive.”</p><p>Draco was surprised that Potter had that kind of insight into what he went through during the war.  He had ambivalent feelings about Potter’s defense of his actions.  He was enormously relieved to have been spared the horrors of Azkaban, thanks largely to Potter’s intercession.  He also had to admit that his sentence was remarkably light compared to the penalties applied to other Death Eaters.  It certainly didn’t hurt to have the support of the wizard who was celebrated for defeating the Dark Lord.  However, Draco could not relinquish his distrust of Potter and would often ascribe ignoble motives to his seemingly altruistic behavior.</p><p>“It’s not surprising when you think about it, Pansy,” Draco complained to his long-time Slytherin friend.  “Potter gets to play the virtuous, all-forgiving Savior of the Wizarding World, defending his arch-nemesis, the disgusting Death-Eater, Draco Malfoy.  It’s another example of his huge Messianic complex.”</p><p>“I can’t believe I’m saying this,” Pansy ventured, “having been voted the most skeptical Slytherin in our class, but don’t you think you’re being a bit too cynical?  Mightn’t Potter have defended you because he believed it was the right thing to do and not because he’d benefit from it?  After all, he did catch a lot of heat afterwards.  Accusations of being a traitor to the cause, even getting death threats from some nut cases, if you can believe the Daily Prophet.” </p><p>“Well, maybe, Pans,” Draco replied, “but don’t expect me to thank that scarhead.”</p><p>“Of course not,” she said with a sly grin. “Besides Potter would probably faint if you did thank him.”</p><p>However, Parkinson’s words continued to resonate in Draco’s mind.  Was he being unfair to Potter?  Was it so hard to believe that Potter’s motives were pure? Despite what his enemies thought, Draco did possess a bit of self-awareness and wasn’t completely devoid of conscience. In spite of the fact that Lucius, Draco's father, was a classic narcissist and  had done everything in his power to prevent Draco from developing either self-awareness or a conscience.  The sole purpose of Draco's existence was to bring honor to Lucius.  Draco had no need of self-awareness; he need only be aware of Lucius’s needs and wants.  Nor did he need a conscience.  That would only prevent Draco from carrying out Lucius’s commands.  But now that Lucius was incarcerated, his influence on Draco was waning. </p><p>Since Lucius began serving his sentence in Azkaban, Draco had noticed himself entertaining new thoughts and behaving a bit differently.  These were small changes, likely unnoticeable to people who didn’t know Draco well.  One example was that he was no longer unkind to the house elves in Malfoy Manor.  Initially he had stopped sneering and cursing at them in frustration.  Eventually he got into the habit of nodding at the house elf who served him meals and on one occasion he even muttered “Thank you” when the magical creature poured him a second cup of coffee.  The house-elf was naturally astonished and replied, “It is Roody’s duty and pleasure to serve Master Draco.”</p><p>Of course Harry never expected or wanted Malfoy to thank him for mounting a defense at his trial.  That was not in the realm of possibility and would have made Harry extremely uncomfortable.  Even though there were so many things about Malfoy that Harry couldn’t abide, the Gryffindor couldn’t help but feel some compassion for the git.  A startling realization that had come to Harry a few years ago was that, if he had to choose between being Lucius Malfoy’s son and living with the Dursleys, he would choose the latter in a heartbeat. That awareness led him to reflect on what Draco’s life had been like.  Maybe as bad as or possibly even worse than his own had been? </p><p>Since Draco’s trial it seemed as though the two men had tacitly agreed to a ceasefire.  Harry observed that Draco no longer sneered or rolled his eyes at him but would simply give him a curt nod when they passed each other at work or in public.  Harry would nod back.  But on rare occasions, especially when Draco was feeling particularly happy about something, he would verbally greet Harry, saying “Potter” and bowing his head slightly.  At those times Harry would respond, “Hello, Malfoy.”  Harry noticed that he preferred the verbal greetings to the silent head nods.  </p><p>The tension between the two men thawed considerably a few months after Draco’s trial.  As soon as he arrived at the Ministry on a bright Friday morning, Harry received the shocking news that Lucius Malfoy had committed suicide in Azkaban.  Despite his overpowering aversion to the elder Malfoy, Harry felt intense compassion for Draco, knowing that the Slytherin would be devastated.  And heads would roll at Azkaban.  There had been so many attempts to institute much needed reforms at the dreaded prison.  Obviously those reforms hadn’t been successful if one of Azkaban’s most renowned inmates had found a way to kill himself. </p><p>Harry immediately dispatched his owl Iphigenia to Draco with a letter expressing his condolences.  He worried that Draco might not believe, let alone appreciate, an expression of sympathy from him, but that couldn’t deter him.  It was the right thing to do.  And so Harry wrote from the heart, telling Draco how sorry he was for his loss.</p><p>Draco was astonished when Iphigenia appeared at his window and even more astonished when he read Harry’s message.  Try as he might, Draco couldn’t find fault with the letter.  Potter certainly hadn’t written it to appear virtuous, as no one other than Draco would know of its existence.  Nor did the letter seem phony. Harry had actually hinted at the enmity that had existed between Lucius and himself, writing, “Although your father and I never did see eye to eye, I know that Lucius Malfoy was a man of many parts, and I’m very sorry for your loss.”  Draco found himself admiring that sentence.  It was diplomatic, kind and, Draco suspected, sincere.  </p><p>Draco also looked at Harry’s offer of assistance with a kind eye.  Harry had written, “Please let me know if there is anything I can do to help.” Draco could read between the lines.  Harry knew that the tabloids, especially the Daily Prophet, would have a field day with the story of Lucius’s suicide and that would cause a major disruption to Draco’s personal and work life.  If anyone could help Draco get through the approaching shitstorm, Harry could—after all, he was a senior official in the Ministry and a close friend of the Minister herself.  </p><p>But perhaps what was most surprising to Draco was the letter’s salutation and closing.  “Dear Draco,” Harry had written at the beginning of the letter.  Draco couldn’t think of another time that Potter had addressed him as “Draco,” and he was surprised by how he found it touching.  But even more touching was how Harry closed the letter—”Harry aka Potter aka Scarhead.” Draco laughed out loud at the closing.  Other people might think it an inappropriate way to close a condolence letter, but the irreverent humor perfectly suited Draco’s personality and deftly acknowledged the complex, snarky relationship between the Slytherin and the Gryffindor. </p><p>In response Draco sent this message to Harry: “Dear Harry, Thank you for your kind expression of sympathy.  Although my relationship with my father was complicated, I deeply grieve his passing.  I also appreciate your generous offer of assistance.  I am rather worried that my father’s death may result in a media circus, so it would perhaps be helpful to meet at the Ministry in the next day or two to discuss damage control?  I appreciate your concern.  Draco aka Malfoy aka Amazing Bouncing Ferret."</p><p>When Harry finished reading Draco’s response, he felt as though he had received a huge gift.  He knew that Draco was speaking from the heart.  He also knew that Draco rarely if ever did that. He had just glimpsed a side of Draco he never knew existed.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Hermione and Harry Talk More about Therapy Options</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Harry and Hermione enjoy take-out curry at Harry's place. They talk more about psychotherapy for Harry and reach some decisions.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Harry, did you get a chance to look through the information I sent you?” Hermione asked.</p><p>The friends were sitting in Harry’s living room at 12 Grimmauld Place after a challenging day at the Ministry.  They had grabbed some take-out curry and apparated at Harry’s house to resume their conversation about Muggle psychotherapy for Harry.</p><p>“Yes,” Harry replied between mouthfuls of delicious pub style chicken curry.  “I read the materials and found the information on Experiential Trauma Therapy especially interesting.  Of all the approaches, that sounded the most promising to me.  But I was wondering how the procedures might be adjusted for a client who’s a wizard.”</p><p>“Tell me more, Harry. I’m intrigued,” Hermione said.</p><p>“Well, as I was reading through the material, I thought about the Boggart work I did with Remus Lupin at Hogwarts.  You can think of that as an Experiential therapy technique for wizards and witches.  You have the experience of encountering the thing you most dread, and you use a Riddikulus incantation to change it into something harmless.  Follow?”</p><p>“Yes, go on, Harry,” Hermione said with excitement. “You’re onto something, I can tell.”</p><p>“During my independent study with Remus, we were using the Boggart to help me fight back against my worst fear—the dementors.  Not only were we working on the Riddikulus incantation, but Remus was also trying to get me to cast my Patronus to fight the dementors.  Even though I wasn’t very good at it, the idea that I could fight back, that I didn’t have to become a willing victim of those horrible things, helped a lot.  What was healing in my work with Remus was the experience of fighting back and feeling that I was getting better at fighting back.”</p><p>“That is so amazing, Harry,” Hermione said in awe. “How did I have no idea about your independent study with Remus?”</p><p>“Well, I kept that a secret from everyone, even you and Ron,” Harry admitted. “I was ashamed of being so scared, especially when the Slytherins made fun of me after that horrible experience on the Hogwarts Express.”</p><p>Hermione nodded in sympathy, and said, “So tell me how this all relates to Muggle psychotherapy.”</p><p>“Well, it got me wondering,” Harry said, “if the Muggle psychologist and I could engage in a process similar to what Remus and I did years ago.  Like if I can encounter my demons, metaphorically speaking, and have an actual experience of fighting back or putting them in their place or banishing them for good.  And I think it would be good if I can employ all my resources, magical and non-magical, to the endeavor.” </p><p>With a sly grin he added, “Plus, Remus used to always give me chocolate after a tough session, so I would prefer a Muggle psychologist who keeps a stash of excellent chocolate, preferably Montezuma, House of Dorchester, or Aphrodite.”</p><p>Hermione laughed out loud.  “Honestly, Harry,” she exclaimed. “But seriously, I think there’s a psychologist who could fit the bill.  His name is Keith Mathey and his understanding of magic is impressive, probably because he has a close relative who is a witch or wizard.  Dr. Mathey comes highly recommended by the staff at St. Mungo’s.  I’ve heard that he is one of the very few Muggles who have been invited to speak to hospital staff about mental and emotional health.  He has also collaborated with magical healers on some difficult cases, and surprisingly the healers expressed appreciation for Dr. Mathey’s assistance."</p><p>“I’m intrigued, now,” Harry said. “So I guess I’ll schedule an appointment with Dr. Keith Mathey.”</p><p>“Do you have a Muggle phone?” Hermione asked. “If not, you can call from the Ministry.”</p><p>“Of course I have a Muggle phone!” Harry huffed. “How could the Head Auror not have a Muggle phone? Nowadays you can’t do good field work without one. I’ll have you know that I have the latest iPhone.”</p><p>“Sorry, so silly of me,” Hermione apologized. “Of course you would have the best Muggle technology available.  But in my defense I’ll remind you that I married into the Weasley family. Arthur Weasley is the sweetest man alive and he is fascinated by all things Muggle, but he still thinks the correct word is 'fellytone.'” </p><p>Harry roared with laughter. The Gryffindors finished their curry dinner and chatted for a while longer, but soon it was time for Hermione to go home and put Rose and Hugo to bed.  </p><p>“This was really great, Harry. I so enjoy spending time with you,” Hermione said. “Come have supper with Ron and me and the kids soon.”  She gave him a goodbye hug, and then disapparated.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Harry and Hermione Help Draco</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>After Lucius Malfoy's suicide, a horde of reporters descends on Malfoy Manor. Harry and Hermione help Draco develop an action plan.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>After Harry and Draco had exchanged messages via owl, they scheduled a meeting at the Ministry of Magic the following Monday morning.  As both men had expected, Lucius Malfoy’s suicide immediately became the top news story in the wizarding world, covered excessively and obnoxiously by The Daily Prophet and the other less popular, but still influential, magical tabloids.  Reporters were camped all around Malfoy Manor, desperate for glimpses of Draco and Narcissa.</p><p>One saving grace was that Narcissa Malfoy had expatriated to France after the war, as she could no longer stand being in Malfoy Manor. Her former home held too many memories of happier times before the name Malfoy had become disgraced and despised and her husband had been carted off in magical restraints to Azkaban. </p><p>Draco had chosen to remain in the manor, of course. Although the Malfoys had lost a substantial part of their fortune due to the huge restitution penalties imposed for their war crimes, they were permitted to keep the manor house and land.  Draco knew that as the sole Malfoy heir it was his duty to protect the family home.  He also realized that, had Harry Potter not defended him at his trial, the Malfoys would undoubtedly have lost the manor too.  He wished he didn’t owe such a huge debt to Potter, but carrying the emotional burden of that debt was preferable to losing the manor. </p><p>Now, however, it had become impossible for Draco to stay in the manor with the hordes of obnoxious reporters skulking about. Not to mention the gloating wizards and witches who, overcome with schadenfreude, descended on the manor in the hopes of seeing a grieving Draco.  Invisibility spells, potions and incantations could not prevent the intruders from violating Draco’s boundaries, at least not for any extended period of time.   He needed help from the Ministry--Potter and Granger were in the best position to provide that help.</p><p>Malfoy was able to disapparate from Malfoy Manor without attracting any attention. He made his way from the lobby of the Ministry to Potter’s office.  He was surprised to find not only Potter, but also Granger, waiting for him. </p><p>”Minister,” Draco greeted Hermione formally.  He didn’t know what to make of her presence and so thought it best to remain silent after greeting her. </p><p>“Hello, Draco,” Hermione said, “And please call me Hermione. No need for formality after all these years.  I am sorry for your loss.”</p><p>Draco bowed his head slightly and whispered, “Thank you.”</p><p>Harry said, “Yes, do let’s try to address each other by our first names.  If we use surnames, it’ll feel like we never left Hogwarts.”  He smiled to himself, thinking about the other less complimentary names he and Draco had for each other.</p><p>Harry continued, “Draco, I asked Hermione to join us because I thought she could help us figure out how to deal with the “media circus,” as you so aptly described it in your message to me.  I assume the circus has already descended on Malfoy Manor?”</p><p>“Indeed it has,” Draco said with a grimace.  “It’s getting impossible to continue living there so long as the bloody media and the vindictive public remain obsessed about my father’s demise.  My mother escaped to Paris right after Dad was taken away to Azkaban.  Evidently she made the right choice.”</p><p>“Have you spoken to her since getting the news about your father?” Harry asked gently.</p><p>“On Friday we had a conversation through two-way mirrors,” Draco replied. “Mother put on a brave face but I know she was highly distraught.”</p><p>“I’m so sorry, Draco,” Hermione said.  Draco nodded to acknowledge her expression of sympathy.</p><p>“Would you like to stay at 12 Grimmauld Place for a while, at least until the pandemonium quiets down?” Harry proposed.</p><p>Draco was astonished by the offer.  “That’s kind of you, Harry, but I couldn’t inconvenience you like that,” Draco said softly.</p><p>“Oh, nonsense,” Harry said, “it’s absolutely no inconvenience.  It’s a huge house, too big for just me and Kreacher.  Besides you probably won’t see much of me as I spend way too many hours here at the Ministry.”  Draco looked skeptical. </p><p>Harry continued, “There are plenty of bedrooms, so you’d have your pick. The only downside is that I’m not a particularly tidy person, so if you can put up with a bit of chaos . . .”</p><p>Draco thought about the prospect of returning to the manor, besieged by throngs of unfriendly faces.  Staying at 12 Grimmauld Place would certainly be preferable to trying to cope with the rabble at the manor.  And yet he was reluctant to increase his debt to Potter.  “I don’t know,” he said, “I appreciate the offer, really I do, but I don’t like the idea of putting you out.”</p><p>Harry realized then that Draco didn’t want to feel indebted to him, and so he said, “Please, Draco, it will make my life so much easier if you’ll come to my place.  It doesn’t have to be for long, just until this insanity quiets down a bit.  If you stay at the manor, I will have to figure out how to deal with the disruption there, which means assigning several aurors to keep the peace.  Once the tabloids know that you are no longer at the manor, the reporters will disperse.  And once that happens you can go back home.”</p><p>“Well, if you insist,” Draco said, giving in. </p><p>“I do,” Harry replied. “And if you absolutely hate it at my place we can always come up with an alternate plan.”</p><p>He looked sheepishly at Harry and said, “Well, if you’ll have me.” </p><p>“Then it’s settled,” Harry concluded.  </p><p>Hermione chimed in then.  “Excellent,” she said. “Now that decision is made, let’s figure out the details.”  </p><p>It was decided that Draco and Harry would apparate at Malfoy Manor to select clothes and whatever other personal effects Draco required and teleport these belongings to 12 Grimmauld Place.  While at the manor, they would also inform Draco’s house elf Roody that his services would be required at Harry’s residence until further notice.  Draco insisted that his owl, Hellebora, not be transported via a spell.  Instead he would instruct Hellebora to fly to 12 Grimmauld Place and attend him there for the duration of his stay.</p><p>Meanwhile, Hermione and Harry assigned a team of aurors to accost the hordes of reporters camped out at Malfoy Manor.  The aurors’ task was to inform the reporters that neither Draco nor Narcissa were currently in residence at the manor but had departed for undisclosed locations.  Persons on or near the Malfoys’ property were also to be warned that any act of trespassing, loitering, or vandalism would be dealt with severely by the Auror Department.</p><p>Although Draco was loath to admit it, he was grateful for Harry’s and Hermione’s help.  The plan they devised enabled him not only to get away from the media circus but also to escape, if only temporarily, the profusion of memories at the manor that triggered waves of grief about his father’s death.  Draco could not bring himself to acknowledge it, but he was also touched by Harry’s and Hermione’s concern about his property.  He had not expected them to dispatch a team of aurors to ensure that no harm would come to the manor.  </p><p>Draco thought about how in the past he had called Hermione a Mudblood, and a wave of shame crashed over him.  How could he possibly make amends for all the contemptible things he had said and done in the past to the witch and the wizard who were now treating him with respect and kindness?  Moreover, his father, whose death he was now grieving, had inspired many of his contemptible words and deeds.  The plethora of confusing and conflicting thoughts and feelings was giving him a massive headache.  Draco realized that he would not be able to resolve his internal conflicts quickly.  Perhaps being away from the manor and getting some breathing space at 12 Grimmauld Place would be exactly what he needed.</p>
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<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Harry's First Therapy Appointment</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Harry travels to central London to have his first appointment with the Muggle psychologist, Dr. Keith Mathey.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>On a coolish day in mid-April Harry made his way to Dr. Keith Mathey’s office in Harley Street.  Harry had decided to take Muggle public transportation for a change.  It had been quite a while since he had spent much time in the Muggle world and he regarded this visit to see the Muggle psychologist as an adventure of sorts. </p><p>He entered the door of a fashionable-looking row house and found himself in a nicely decorated waiting area.  He approached the reception desk behind which sat a pretty young woman, whose name, according to the silver name plate on her desk, was Nicola Gunn.  Harry introduced himself to Ms. Gunn tentatively, “Hello, I’m Harry Potter here to see Dr. Mathey?”</p><p>“Ah, yes, Mr. Potter,” Ms. Gunn said with a smile.  “I see you have an appointment at half two.  Thanks for arriving a few minutes early.  There are a few forms I need you to fill out.”  She handed Harry a pen and a clipboard attached to which were several sheets of paper.  Harry wondered whether Ms. Gunn was aware of magic at all and, if so, whether she knew that Dr. Mathey provided therapy to wizards and witches. </p><p>Harry filled out the forms as best he could, taking care to answer the questions as if he were a Muggle, not a wizard.  After all he didn’t know who, other than Dr. Mathey, might have access to the forms.  The forms also included information and questions related to payment of services.  Hermione had informed him that Dr. Mathey would negotiate a fee for his services after conducting an initial assessment of Harry’s concerns.  As Harry didn’t know how to answer the questions about payment, he left them unanswered.  He returned the forms to Ms. Gunn and said, “ I did the best I could, but there were some questions I couldn’t answer.”  </p><p>“No worries,” Ms. Gunn replied.  “Dr. Mathey will review the forms and, if he needs additional information, he’ll be sure to ask you.”  Harry nodded and said, “Thank you.” </p><p>Right at half two, a nicely dressed gentleman wearing a navy blue blazer over tan slacks entered the waiting room.  He appeared to be in his mid 40s.  He was average height, about 175 centimeters tall, good looking, with light brown hair and blue eyes. He approached Harry and said, “Mr. Potter?”   </p><p>Harry rose, nodding, and the gentleman held out his right hand. “Hello, Mr. Potter.  I’m Keith Mathey.  Thanks for coming in today.  Let’s head to my office, shall we?”</p><p>“Pleased to meet you,” Harry said, following Dr. Mathey down a short corridor and into a spacious office.  When Harry and Dr. Mathey entered the room, a middle-aged woman wearing a smart business suit rose from the chair she had been sitting in.  She smiled warmly at Harry.</p><p>After closing the office door, Dr. Mathey made the introductions.  “Mr. Potter, please meet my associate Ms. Hilda Lancaster.  Hilda, please meet Mr. Harry Potter.”  Harry and Ms. Lancaster exchanged polite greetings.</p><p>“Let me explain Ms. Lancaster’s presence,” Dr. Mathey began.  “When I provide services to wizards and witches, I find it helpful to enlist the assistance of a psychological technician who has magical abilities. Ms. Lancaster is a witch whom I have personally trained to assist with my magical clients.  Her role will be to ensure your safety in our sessions, especially when we are using magical interventions to effect healing.  Mr. Potter, do you have any questions about Ms. Lancaster’s role?”</p><p>Harry took a moment to reflect before responding, “Can you give me an example of a safety concern that might arise, and what Ms. Lancaster might do to ensure my safety?”</p><p>“I think I’d like to answer the question, if I may,” Ms. Lancaster said, to which Dr. Mathey nodded in assent. </p><p>“First, I’d like to assure you that we won’t be doing anything dangerous in our sessions,” she began.  “I know too that you are a powerful wizard and unlikely to require any protection from me.  That said, in trauma treatment we use magical tools like the pensieve, Boggarts, and even the Mirror of Erised.  If the magical client experiences difficulty when we use those tools, it helps to have another witch or wizard standing by to lend a hand.  My role is that of a monitor, to ensure that everything is progressing as it should and that you do not experience excessive distress.  If anything magical starts to go even slightly awry, I use my magic to set things right.  Dr. Mathey, in spite of his many gifts, cannot cast the spells, charms, and incantations to prevent magic from causing harm.  That's where I come in."</p><p>“That makes sense,” Harry said.  “Thank you for the explanation.”</p><p>Dr. Mathey then said, “Please do not hesitate to ask any questions or express any concerns that may come up for you, Mr. Potter.  It’s critically important to Ms. Lancaster and me that you feel safe and comfortable with the treatment.  I also want to assure you that Ms. Lancaster and I both have an ethical obligation to maintain your confidentiality.  So whatever is said or happens in this office is kept completely confidential.”</p><p>“I appreciate that, Dr. Mathey,” Harry said. “And please call me ‘Harry.’  That will go a long way to making me feel more comfortable.  I’m not a particularly formal person.”</p><p>“Very well then, Harry,” Dr. Mathey said with a kind smile. “Then I must insist you call me ‘Keith.’”</p><p>“And please call me ‘Hilda’,” Ms. Lancaster added.</p><p>“So let’s begin, shall we?” Keith suggested.  He began gathering information about Harry’s history.  Some of the information Harry shared was already familiar to both Keith and Hilda.  However, they were astonished to learn about Harry’s experience of horrible childhood abuse when he lived with the Dursleys, as well as the torture that Dolores Umbridge had inflicted on him.  Keith asked most of the questions in an attempt to establish an accurate timeline of the many traumatic events in Harry’s life.  However, Hilda would interject a question here and there to clarify the magical details, such as how exactly Harry was able to summon the phoenix Fawkes to rescue him in the Chamber of Secrets.</p><p>After interviewing Harry for about a half hour, Keith said, “Harry, I know we have just scratched the surface of your amazing and often difficult life, but it’s important to me that you don’t get overwhelmed by recounting past painful experiences.  I also think that the best bet is to proceed slowly and cautiously, which means starting off by working on less painful traumatic experiences before moving to the more painful, deeper wounds.”  </p><p>Harry nodded.  “That sounds good to me,” he said, adding with a smile, “I don’t want to get overwhelmed either.” </p><p>“So, here’s what I suggest,” Keith said.  “Let’s meet again next week at the same time.  For homework, I’d like you to think of some less painful, less serious traumatic experiences we could start working on.  In my business we sometimes use the terms “little t traumas” and “big T traumas” to distinguish between less severe and more severe traumatic experiences.  So try to come up with a list of “little t traumas” in your life that we can start working on, OK?”</p><p>“Will do,” Harry said agreeably. </p><p>Hilda then said, “It was a real pleasure meeting you, Harry, and I look forward to working with you.  We wizards and witches need to work on our ability to heal mental and emotional wounds.  That’s why I’m so grateful for the opportunity to work with and learn from Keith.  I suspect today may have been a bit challenging for you, remembering and recounting painful episodes in your life.  With your permission I’d like to cast a Stamina charm to help restore your emotional energy.  Would that be OK?”</p><p>“By all means,” Harry replied gratefully. “That would be wonderful.”</p><p>Hilda cast the charm and said, “I wish I could do more, but unfortunately there are not many incantations to heal the psyche.  Our community needs to work on remedying that.”</p><p>Harry did feel more energized after Hilda cast the charm.  After saying farewell to Keith and Hilda, he left their office with a bounce in his step.  He felt hopeful about the therapy work he had just begun.  He decided not to take Muggle transportation home, instead choosing to apparate in his living room at 12 Grimmauld Place.</p>
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<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Harry and Draco Talk about Their Marriages</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Draco has moved into Harry's home at 12 Grimmauld Place.  The two men share personal information about their marriages.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It shouldn’t have come as a surprise to Draco that he felt so at home at 12 Grimmauld Place.  It was, after all, the ancestral home of the Black family and Draco had Black blood running through his veins.  He could trace his maternal ancestry on the tapestry of the Black family tree in the drawing room.  He was astonished to see his name on the tree, as well as the names of his son Scorpius and his cousin Edward “Teddy” Lupin.  </p><p>After inheriting the ancestral home from his godfather Sirius Black, Harry considered it his duty to be a good custodian of the many historical treasures on the property.  Studying the Black family tree, Harry was bothered by the fact that it was so out of date.  Black family descendants born in the last three decades were not on the tapestry.  Harry was also troubled that disowned members of the family had been removed from the tapestry, burn marks appearing in place of their names. The thought occurred to him that a powerful symbol of dismantling the ideology of blood purity that had engendered the wizarding wars would be to update the tapestry, restoring and adding Black family members who were not pureblood or who had married non-pureblood spouses.  </p><p>Harry had hired a team of wizards and witches, skilled in the magical restoration of fine art, to add the names of younger Black family descendants to the tapestry, including Draco, Scorpius, and Teddy.  The restoration team was also tasked with adding back to the tapestry the names of disowned family members, including Sirius Black and Andromeda Tonks; an untrained eye could not tell that those names had ever been removed.  </p><p>When the opportunity presented itself, Draco asked Harry about the tapestry.  “I was surprised to see the changes to the family tree since I last laid eyes on it,” Draco said.  His eyes widened listening to Harry’s explanation. </p><p>“I hope it doesn’t bother you that I took the liberty to add non-pureblood family members and restore the names of disowned members to the tapestry,” Harry said.  “It felt a bit presumptuous of me, not being a member of the Black family.  But I guess my commitment to social justice took precedence, and as custodian of this ancestral home, I decided it was my prerogative to restore the tapestry in a way that reflected my own values.  It didn’t feel right that two of my heroes, Sirius and Andromeda, had been removed from the tree, and that someone like Teddy Lupin wouldn’t be included because he’s half-blood.”</p><p>Draco nodded. “I approve of the changes, Harry,” he said.  “It’s fitting that Sirius, Andromeda, and Teddy are represented.  I also appreciate the addition of Scorpius and me.”</p><p>“By the way, where is Scorpius these days?” Harry asked.</p><p>Draco sighed and said, “He has been living with his mother in Scotland.  Astoria and I had a rather serious row about three months ago, and we agreed that we needed some space from each other.  She insisted that I stay at the manor, while she took Scorpius with her to visit her aunt in Edinburgh.  I miss Scorpius a lot.” </p><p>“Do you not miss Astoria too?” Harry asked gently.</p><p>“Truth be told, not as much as I miss Scorpius,” Draco replied. “Things were tense between Astoria and me for quite some time.  We were under a lot of stress what with father’s incarceration, mother’s departure for Paris, my trial.  Mother never approved of Astoria—political differences, you know—and Astoria was angry at me for not standing up for her more.  The thing is that I know my mother. If I had stood up for Astoria, that would have increased mother’s resentment towards her.  Looking back, I think we stayed together as long as we did because of Scorpius.”</p><p>Harry understood what Draco meant about “political differences” between Narcissa and Astoria.  Narcissa was a pureblood bigot; Astoria was not.  Apparently Narcissa disapproved of Astoria’s tolerance of non-pureblood wizards and witches.  Harry knew he would have gotten along much better with Astoria than with Narcissa.  </p><p>“Marriage isn’t easy, is it?” Harry said with sigh.  “When do you think you’ll see Scorpius again?”</p><p>“I try to talk to him a few times a week either through two-way mirrors or Floo Powder,” Draco replied. “Astoria and I negotiated a six-month trial separation, so we have another three months to figure out what we’re going to do about our marriage.  At this point it doesn’t look good, I’m afraid.”</p><p>“Sorry to hear that, Draco,” Harry said with sincerity.</p><p>“What about your kids, Harry?  How are James, Albus and Lily doing?” Draco asked.</p><p>“They’re all great, thanks for asking,” Harry replied.  “Of course the divorce was hard on James.  Albus and Lily are too young to really understand that Ginny and I are divorced.  I already felt bad about being a lousy husband, and then knowing how much our breakup hurt James, well, I never felt such intense guilt before.”</p><p>“If you don’t mind my asking,” Draco said, “why did you and Ginny break up?  You always seemed like the perfect couple.”</p><p>Harry took a deep breath before responding.  “We got married too young,” he said. “I think Ginny was in love with an image in her head of who I was, and not who I actually am.  She was in love with “The Boy Who Lived,” not Harry the complicated, difficult person.  And I was desperate for stability after the war, just wanting to settle down and live a comfortable, predictable life.  I thought Ginny could provide that.  We soon discovered that our pieces didn’t fit together too well.  But probably the most important reason we divorced is that I’m gay.”</p><p>Draco’s mouth opened in surprise. “Oh!” was all he could manage, followed by several beats of deafening silence.  Eventually he said, “But you fathered three children, so you can’t be all that gay.”</p><p>Harry laughed easily.  “Well, perhaps it would be more accurate to say that I’m bisexual, but the fact of the matter is that I prefer men to women.  It took me a while to admit that to myself.” </p><p>Draco was astonished.  The Chosen One had just disclosed to him that he’s gay.  Draco was shocked not only by Harry’s sexual orientation but also by Harry’s willingness to come out to his former enemy, the old rival who had used every possible device to make Harry’s life miserable.  Harry’s honest declaration indicated either that he trusted Draco or that he felt invulnerable to the homophobia that was rampant in the magical community.  Maybe both. Whatever the case might be Draco was impressed. </p><p>There were a million questions Draco wanted to ask Harry.  “So are you still on good terms with the Weasleys?  It looks like you and Granger are still good friends.”</p><p>Harry looked thoughtful before replying, “Ron was very mad at me for a while. He felt betrayed.  Not just because Ginny and I were getting a divorce, but mostly because he was my best friend and he didn’t know I was gay.  He thought I kept it from him, which I suppose I did, but only because I was oblivious or in denial myself.  Ron eventually came around after we had a long heart-to-heart.” </p><p>Draco nodded.  “What about Ginny and your other in-laws?” </p><p>Harry smiled then.  “Ginny has been an absolute gem.  The first few years of our marriage I suppose were happy enough.  There was a honeymoon period right after we tied the knot.  We had three beautiful children in quick succession.  But eventually we couldn’t deny that there was something missing for both of us.  After the first few years of marriage we were both miserable for different reasons.  Ginny recognized before I did that we weren’t right for each other.  She admitted to me that she had an adolescent crush on The Boy Who Lived and didn’t really know the real me before we married.  She discovered that the real Harry Potter had psychic scars and emotional wounds and could be quite moody.  Which was antithetical to Ginny’s light, vibrant, and upbeat personality. And then I went and fell in love with someone else.”   </p><p>Harry took a long pause, and it was clear to Draco that he was going back in his mind to an earlier time.   Draco was sitting on the edge of his seat, anxious to hear more.  Eventually Harry continued, “I started frequenting The Walloping Wand, the gay bar in Diagon Alley.  In Auror training I had learned some transfiguration spells so I was able to disguise myself enough to be unrecognizable.  I was petrified that someone would discover that the Head Auror of the Ministry of Magic, the Boy Who Lived, was gay.  At the Walloping Wand I met a gay wizard named Eoin. We hit it off, one thing led to another, and we ended up having a year-long affair.”</p><p>“Wow, Harry,” Draco said. “You’re blowing my mind.  So I take it Ginny found out?”</p><p>“Eventually I told her,” Harry said.  “She knew something was up. And I couldn’t keep lying to her.  It was eating me up inside.  But I think she had decided we were over before that conversation.  We agreed to divorce, and then came the hardest part—talking to James and the Weasleys.”</p><p>“How did the Weasleys take it?” Draco asked.</p><p>“Well, like I said, Ron was really angry at me because I had kept secrets from him.  Hermione was sad but supportive.  I suspect Ginny had been confiding in ‘Mione about how she wasn’t happy in our marriage, so it probably came as no surprise.  Arthur and Molly were upset, I know, but they are a class act.  They said that I would always be a part of their family and would always be welcome in their home.  The other Weasley men, Bill, Charlie, and George, followed Ginny’s lead.  She stated very clearly to her family that our divorce had been a mutual decision and that we had agreed to stay on good terms.  The Weasleys are truly amazing people, and I feel incredibly blessed that they still consider me a member of their family.”</p><p>“Yes,” Draco said. “They do sound like remarkable people.”  He had been raised to believe that the Weasleys were an inferior wizarding family.  He was experiencing a high level of cognitive dissonance. The kindness and love the Weasleys had shown Harry sounded so wonderful, in contrast to the cold, forbidding, and judgmental attitude with which the Malfoys treated everyone, including their own family members.  Draco’s mind was reeling, and he realized that he needed a break from this conversation.  He need time by himself to reflect.</p><p>“This has been an eye-opening conversation, Harry,” Draco said.  “I’m feeling a bit tired, so I think I’ll go lie down for a bit.  Shall we get together for supper around 7 p.m.?”</p><p>“Sounds good,” Harry replied. “I’ll ask Kreacher and Roody to have supper ready at 7.”</p>
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<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Harry's Second Therapy Appointment</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Harry meets with Dr. Keith Mathey and Ms. Hilda Lancaster for the second time.  Using a pensieve he retrieves and works through some memories of childhood abuse.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Harry arrived for his second therapy appointment with Dr. Mathey and Ms. Lancaster.  Since his first session he had thought about what “little t traumas” he wanted to start working on.  Even though it might not be considered a minor trauma in another person’s life, Harry thought he would start with his childhood abuse at the home of the Dursleys.  Given the many and intense traumatic experiences in Harry’s life, what he had suffered living with the Dursleys, while extremely unpleasant, was at least not life-threatening.  Moreover, it had all happened so long ago.  These days Harry tended to think of his painful childhood experiences as bad dreams that disappeared upon awakening.</p><p>Harry explained to Keith and Hilda his decision to focus first on his experiences of childhood abuse.  They agreed that a pensieve would be useful to access and work with Harry’s childhood memories.  Harry would retrieve specific memories from his time at the Dursleys, he and Hilda would watch and describe the memories, and Keith would guide Harry to do the therapeutic work as he revisited scenes from his childhood. </p><p>Keith brought out a beautiful stone bowl carved with runes.  He said, “Harry, this pensieve is intended only for your therapy.  It will contain only the memories you siphon into it while in therapy.  At the conclusion of your therapy, you will have three options.  The first option is to take the pensieve with you to do as you please.  The second option is to entrust us to safeguard it, and I can provide details about how that is accomplished.  The third option is to destroy the pensieve.   No need to decide now, and we will have plenty of opportunity to discuss these options further.  While you are in therapy, the pensieve will remain here under lock and key and safeguarded by several protective enchantments.  Do you have any questions?”</p><p>Harry shook his head. “No, it all makes sense,” he said.</p><p>“Well, then, why don’t we begin?” Keith said.  Placing the pensieve directly in front of Harry, he said, “Now if you can start siphoning memories about your time at the Dursleys into the pensieve . . . try to focus on memories in which you are interacting with the Dursleys, but for the time being try to avoid any memories that are too painful, too distressing.” </p><p>Harry frowned in concentration, siphoning childhood memories into the bowl, which started to fill with a gaseous liquid.  After a few minutes, Keith said, “I believe that is sufficient for now, Harry.  Thank you.”  </p><p>Hilda took a seat on the sofa next to Harry.  Keith said, “The next step is for you and Hilda to watch the memories together.  Harry, I’d like you to describe what you are seeing in the present tense, as if he were happening right here and now.”</p><p>Peering into the pensieve, Harry and Hilda watched Harry’s memory of Vernon and Petunia berating him.  Breathing heavily, Harry started describing the scene, “I’m five years old. They’re screaming at me. They’re screaming and screaming.  That I’m useless and good for nothing.  That I don’t deserve all the kindness they’ve shown me.  That my parents were horrible people who deserved to die.  That it was a shame I didn’t die with them.” </p><p>“OK, Harry, look away from the pensieve now,” Keith whispered. “Close your eyes.  Imagine yourself back in the scene, but now you are an adult, witnessing the Dursleys screaming at this helpless little boy who has tragically lost his parents.  What will you do and say to help that little boy?  Don’t hold back, let it out.”</p><p>Harry tensed up then and started yelling.  Hilda cast a quick soundproofing charm to ensure that his voice wouldn’t reach therapists and clients in adjacent offices.  </p><p>“Shut the fuck up!” Harry yelled. “You are the useless, good for nothing ones.  You are the ones who deserve to die.  You are both horrible and cruel.  My mum and dad were brilliant, loving people.  Voldemort should have killed you, not them!”  Harry then broke down in tears, shaking all over.</p><p>Hilda reached over and touched him gently on the shoulder.  Keith inquired gently, “How are you feeling now, Harry?”</p><p>“Exhausted,” Harry said.  “I wanted to curse them with Avada Kedavra.”</p><p>“I bet you did,” Keith said with a smile that conveyed understanding and acceptance.</p><p>“I think maybe a calming draught will help,” Hilda said.  She rose and left, returning soon with a cup of the potion.  Harry accepted the proffered drink gratefully.</p><p>After Harry appeared slightly more sorted, Keith asked, “Is that enough for today, Harry, or would you like to do some more work?  We have enough time for another memory, I believe.”</p><p>“I’d like to try another,” Harry said.  “Even though it was tiring, it felt good to stand up to those tossers.”</p><p>He siphoned another memory into the pensieve, a memory of his aunt denying him food, banishing him to the cupboard under the stairs when he was ravenously hungry. </p><p>After viewing and describing the memory, Harry let Petunia have it with both barrels. “How dare you withhold food from your nephew, your own sister’s only son, you fucking cow! Just because you were jealous that she had magic and you didn’t!  The most barbaric and inhuman person in the world wouldn’t keep food from a starving boy.  If anyone deserves the Cruciatus curse, it’s you.  Even the Ministry of Magic would exonerate me for casting it.”</p><p>When he was done expressing his anger at Petunia, Hilda again touched him gently and offered him the cup of calming draught.  Harry took the cup and sipped from it.  He then smiled at Keith and Hilda and said, “That was hard, but amazing. I feel so much lighter now.”</p><p>Keith and Hilda smiled back at Harry.  “Excellent work today, Harry,” Keith said.  “You may find yourself experiencing strong emotions after today’s session.  Some emotions may be very positive, for example, feeling empowered and gratified, but other emotions may be more difficult, such as strong feelings of grief or anger.  I encourage you to engage in some good self-care between now and our next session.  Also to connect with friends and family members whom you trust, people who can provide emotional support and affirmation.  You did a lot of hard work today in therapy, so take good care of yourself, OK?”</p><p>“I will, Keith, and thank you,” Harry replied.  Looking at Hilda, he said, "Thank you too, Hilda. I am grateful for your support."</p><p>"You're very welcome, Harry," Hilda responded with a smile.</p>
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<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Lucius Malfoy's Funeral</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Harry Potter attends Lucius Malfoy's funeral at Malfoy Manor.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Draco was grateful for Harry’s support as he prepared to make arrangements for Lucius Malfoy’s funeral.  Lucius’s body had been transported from Azkaban to the drawing room at Malfoy Manor, where the coffin lay in state in the drawing room.  Draco and Narcissa had agreed to a small private ceremony.  Although most of the media attention following Lucius’s death had died down, thanks in large part to the aurors’ earlier intervention, several security enchantments were cast to keep unwelcome visitors at bay.  </p><p>Those who were invited to attend Lucius’s funeral were, for the most part, pureblood wizards and witches who shared his political views.  Narcissa had returned for the funeral but did not plan to stay long.  Astoria had come from Scotland with Scorpius and planned to return to Edinburgh right after the funeral.  Several of Draco’s friends from Hogwarts were there, including Pansy Parkinson, Blaise Zabini, and Pike, his former Quidditch teammate. </p><p>As soon as Harry apparated in the drawing room of Malfoy Manor, he looked around to see who else was in attendance and immediately felt ill at ease.  He expected that he was persona non grata to many of the pureblood wizards who had allied themselves with the Dark Lord during the Second Wizarding War.  Draco, however, came to his rescue right away, extending his hand and saying, “Harry, thank you so much for coming.  Please come say hello to my mother.”</p><p>Before the funeral Draco had told Narcissa that Harry would be attending and had urged her to treat him with respect.  “He has treated me with kindness, mother.  Please let us return the favor.”</p><p>Escorting Harry to where his mother stood, Draco said, “Mother, please welcome my friend and colleague, Mr. Harry Potter.”</p><p>Narcissa was all politeness.  “Mr. Potter.  Thank you for coming.  It means a great deal to Draco and me.”</p><p>“Mrs. Malfoy,” Harry said with a genteel bow. “It is an honor to be here, and I am so sorry for your loss.” </p><p>Narcissa inclined her head in acknowledgement. </p><p>“Come say hello now to Astoria and Scorpius,” Draco said, leading Harry across the room to where his wife and son sat on a beautiful antique sofa. </p><p>“Astoria,” Draco began, “You remember our former classmate, Harry Potter.” </p><p>“Of course,” Astoria said, smiling and extending her hand. “How could I ever forget the famous Harry Potter?”</p><p>Harry took her hand and returned her smile.  “Astoria, lovely to see you again,” he said.  He was struck by her arresting beauty—her luscious dark hair, porcelain skin, and lovely, serene expression.  Harry was then distracted by a tug on his pant leg.  Looking down he saw Scorpius and crouched down so that they were face to face.  “Hello, little wizard,” Harry said, “what’s your name?”</p><p>“Scorpius,” the tiny boy said softly. “Who are you?”</p><p>“My name’s Harry.” </p><p>Draco chimed in then and said, “Scorpius, this is the man I was telling you about.  Harry Potter, remember?”</p><p>Scorpius’s eyes widened then, and he said, “You’re the boy who lived?!”</p><p>Harry smiled with embarrassment. “That’s me, I guess,” he said. </p><p>“Can I see your scar?” Scorpius asked in the outspoken way that only children can get away with.</p><p>“Sure,” Harry said easily, brushing his hair away from his forehead to expose the scar. </p><p>“Wow!” Scorpius exclaimed. “Did it hurt?”</p><p>“I suppose that it did,” Harry said, “but it happened when I was younger than you are now, so I don’t remember.” </p><p>“Wow,” Scorpius said again.</p><p>Draco, who had been looking with intense fondness at the exchange between Harry and Scorpius, said, “There will be time later, Scorpius, for you to ask Mr. Potter additional questions, but now we have some business to attend to.”</p><p>“Yes, father,” Scorpius said obediently. Draco kissed the top of his son’s head.</p><p>Harry said goodbye to Astoria and Scorpius and then followed Draco to greet other guests.  He had several cordial conversations with the Slytherins—Pansy and Pike were quite friendly, while Blaise was a bit standoffish.</p><p>Before long Draco announced the beginning of the service.  The attendees took their seats facing Lucius’s coffin.  Pansy’s father, Perseus Parkinson, gave the eulogy.  He spoke with eloquence and passion, praising Lucius’s accomplishments and celebrating his dedication to the preservation of magical culture.  Harry read between the lines and understood that Mr. Parkinson meant the preservation of pureblood magical culture.  But this was not the time or place to express his indignation.</p><p>Following the eulogy, several people stood and shared sentiments in Lucius’s honor.  Draco spoke from the heart about how he loved his father, in spite of Lucius’s faults, and about the important life lessons Lucius had taught him.  Harry was surprised that Draco had referred to Lucius’s faults, and he teared up hearing Draco’s heartfelt testimony.</p><p>After the last person had spoken, the time had come for Lucius’s interment. Several wizards and witches raised their wands to cast a complex combination of spells.  A flash of blinding light filled the drawing room, accompanied by a loud crack.  The flash of light instantaneously vanished and Lucius’s coffin had disappeared. </p><p>Then Draco announced, “Let us now proceed to the garden and pay our respects at my father’s tomb.”  Taking his mother’s hand, Draco led the procession into the beautiful garden surrounding the manor.  The assembly walked to a secluded corner of the garden where an impressive tomb stood, the name Lucius Malfoy and the image of a serpent emblazoned in silver on the stunning Carrara marble surface.</p><p>Astoria gave each attendee a white lily.  As Draco and Narcissa led the procession past the tomb, each guest placed a lily in front of Lucius’s final resting place.</p><p>After the ceremony, Draco approached Harry and said, “Thank you for being here today. Your presence has been comforting.  Will you stay and visit with Scorpius and me for a while? It would mean a lot to me.”</p><p>“Of course,” Harry said, pulling Draco into a tight hug.  He whispered, “You were brilliant, today. Your father would be so proud.” A feeling of warmth suffused Draco’s body.</p>
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<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Draco Reflects on His Relationship with Harry</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>After Lucius's funeral, Draco reflects on his relationship with Harry.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Since moving into 12 Grimmauld Place, Draco found, to his surprise, that he rather enjoyed Harry’s company.  The two wizards had quite naturally fallen into a comfortable rhythm, often enjoying breakfast together at home before apparating together at the Ministry of Magic for a day of work.  After work they might go for a pint at the Leaky Cauldron, or just head back to the Black ancestral home for a delicious supper prepared by Kreacher and Roody.  The two house-elves seemed to be working together harmoniously and had come to regard both Harry and Draco as their wizard masters.  </p><p>As the two men spent more and more time together, Draco’s distrust of Harry continued to erode. Draco was now confiding personal information to Harry that he had never shared with another soul.  It had begun with the conversation in which both men had talked openly about their marriages and Harry had come out to Draco.  After that conversation Draco was inclined to turn to Harry whenever he needed advice or support. </p><p>When Draco’s anxiety was skyrocketing before his father’s funeral, Harry was able to talk him down.  He reassured Draco that everything would go like clockwork, and that Draco would do his father proud.  Harry promised to be there for Draco, and he was as good as his word.  At Lucius’s funeral Draco had relied on Harry for emotional support.  Just having Harry there made the grief-filled day significantly less painful.</p><p>Draco had made himself quite comfortable in Harry’s home. He had chosen a bedroom on the third floor and decorated it to his satisfaction in his favorite colors of silver and green.  Not wanting to overstay his welcome, however, he decided to broach the subject of when he should be returning to Malfoy Manor.</p><p>“Now that it has been more than a week since my father’s funeral, I expect that things have quieted down at the manor,” Draco said to Harry one evening after work.  “Perhaps I should think about going home.”</p><p>Harry gave him a startled look.  “Well, only if you would rather be there than here,” Harry replied.  “Truth be told, I have been enjoying your company, Draco.  Since you’ve been here, I haven’t felt as lonely as I did before, rattling around in this huge house all by myself.  You’re welcome to stay as long as you’d like.”</p><p>Draco was surprised by the relief he felt. “Thanks, Harry,” he said. “I appreciate your hospitality.  I suppose I will stay for a while longer.  To be perfectly honest, the thought of being back at the manor, full of dark memories, doesn’t appeal.”  As an afterthought he added, “But please don’t hesitate to tell me to go home when you get sick of my presence.  That famous American Muggle Ben Franklin said that house guests, like fish, start to smell after three days, and I’ve been here for much longer than that.”</p><p>“No worries, Draco,” Harry said with a laugh.  “I’m not picking up any foul odor from you.  In fact, I quite like the smell of your cologne.”  Draco blushed.</p><p>*****</p><p>Since the conversation in which Harry had come out to Draco, the wizards had not talked again about Harry’s sexual orientation.  Draco did wonder, however, about Harry’s love life.  He had talked about a one-year relationship with a gay wizard named Eoin.  Did Harry have other gay lovers? Did he continue to visit the Walloping Wand, looking for sexual partners? And what about his experience with women? Had he been intimate with any women other than Ginevra Weasley? </p><p>Draco could only surmise that many witches and not a few gay wizards would find The Chosen One exceedingly appealing.  He imagined that quite a few people had thrown themselves at Harry over the years.  And Draco had to admit that Harry had matured into a very handsome wizard.  Despite his small stature, he had a commanding presence; people took notice when he entered a room, and not just because he was the famous Harry Potter.  Harry had an attractive build—he was slender and fit.  In the privacy of their shared home Draco had seen Harry with only his boxers on and had noted his muscular and wiry build.  Draco also thought that Harry had a handsome face—his emerald eyes were penetratingly beautiful, and his entire face lit up when he smiled.  </p><p>Yes, Harry was a catch, not only because he was physically attractive, but also because he was strong, brave, and kind.  No longer the pompous, selfish, bigoted Slytherin he had once been, Draco was now able to acknowledge that he had been the beneficiary of Harry’s strength, bravery, and kindness on many occasions since his trial.  And for this he was grateful. </p><p>Before now friendships had never been particularly satisfying to Draco.  At Hogwarts he had been vaguely aware that he envied Harry his intensely close friendships with Ron and Hermione.  The three of them obviously had each other’s backs.  In contrast, Draco had Crabbe and Goyle, who not only weren’t the sharpest knives in the drawer, but would also betray Draco in a heartbeat if it would benefit them.  His relationships with Pansy and Blaise had been based on what he now recognized as a shared nastiness, full of snide and scornful humor.  Fortunately, he and Pansy had outgrown that pattern and were now able to converse as mature adults.  Blaise, however, seemed forever stuck in adolescence.  As for Astoria, Draco supposed that he did feel love for her, although there was a coolness, a reserve that had always characterized their relationship, and that relationship was now on rocky ground.</p><p>As he reflected on his past relationships, Draco realized that for the first time in his life he now had the opportunity to enjoy a real friendship, based on warmth, good humor, honesty, and caring.  And that friendship was with Harry Potter, of all people.  He realized too how much he valued his connection with Harry.  He now had a sense of what it would be like to have a true friend, someone you could confide in, someone you admired, someone whom you wanted to help and support.  He recalled how Harry had talked to Scorpius at Lucius’s funeral, and how Draco had welled up with affection watching them interact.  </p><p>For the first time in his life Draco really understood the bond that Harry shared with his best friends, Ron and Hermione, and he realized that throughout his life he had desperately yearned to share that kind of bond with at least one other person.  All the despicable behavior of his youth had been an ineffective defense against the pain of loneliness.  He now knew that he wanted more than anything to be close friends with Harry Potter.</p>
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<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Harry Does More Pensieve Work in Therapy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Harry continues to work through traumatic experiences in therapy with the help of the pensieve.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>During his next several therapy sessions, Harry continued to do pensieve work with the help of Keith and Hilda.  They agreed that for the time being he would focus on painful experiences that were not life-threatening.  Only after he was feeling more resolved about those experiences would they proceed to address Harry’s “big T traumas.”</p><p>During one session Harry focused on distressing interactions he had with Severus Snape while at Hogwarts.  Even though Harry had come to admire the Half-Blood Prince, even choosing “Severus” as his younger son’s middle name, he was haunted by his former Potions professor’s looks of contempt and disdain, not to mention the cold and angry insults and accusations he had frequently hurled at Harry.</p><p>After siphoning several memories of his encounters with Professor Snape into the pensieve, Harry and Hilda viewed the memories, after which Harry began to describe them to Keith and reflect on his relationship with the professor who he always believed hated him.   Keith encouraged Harry to imagine that he was talking directly to Snape.  “What do you want to say to him, Harry?”</p><p>Harry released a torrent of words.  “Why did you have to be so mean to me? I know my dad and his friends bullied you, but I’m not my dad.  I was just a kid trying to survive. You loved my mom.  Couldn’t you be kind to her son?  My life would have been so much easier if you had treated me with kindness instead of cruelty. Do you know how scared I was of you for so long?  How awful I would feel after you sneered at me, mocked me, criticized me, and accused me of all kinds of misdeeds?”</p><p>Keith then asked, “What do you wish Professor Snape would say back to you, Harry?”</p><p>“I wish he would be honest with me,” Harry replied.</p><p>“What do you think that would look like, Harry?” Keith asked gently.  “What words would you like Professor Snape to say back to you?  Can you pretend to be him, responding to what you just told him?”</p><p>“I’ll give it a try,” Harry said.  He closed his eyes and tried to imagine an ideal version of Snape, a wizard who would be honest and own his mistakes.  Then assuming the role of this ideal Snape he began speaking in a voice that sounded remarkably like the Potions professor’s: “You’re right, Harry.  I was needlessly mean to you.  I looked at you and saw your father who had bullied me at Hogwarts when I was a kid.  I saw the man who had taken your mother away from me.  The man I hated. There were times I felt guilty for treating you the way I did.  I would think about your mother and know how sad and angry she would feel if she had witnessed our interactions.  But I couldn’t help myself.  I was so bitter about what your dad and his friends had done to me, and I focused all that bitterness on you.  That was wrong of me, but I hope that you will remember that I did protect you as well.”</p><p>After Harry had finished speaking, Keith asked, “How was that experience for you, Harry?”</p><p>“Intense,” Harry replied. “Until I started speaking, I didn’t realize how much I had repressed and denied about my relationship with Snape.  It surprises me now that I named my son Albus Severus, seeing how much anger I harbored for the way Snape treated me all those years.  I suppose that when Albus was born I was focused more on Snape’s work as a double agent during the war and how he protected me, rather than on how badly he treated me at Hogwarts.”</p><p>“What was it like for you to come up with the words you wish he could say to you?” Keith asked.</p><p>“It helped to consider why he might have acted the way he did,” Harry replied. “I’ll never know for sure what his motivation was, and I certainly will never hear those words from him.  Still, it helps to entertain the possibility that he treated me badly not because I deserved it but because of his own issues.”</p><p>“I believe whole-heartedly that you did not deserve the way he treated you,” Hilda said.  Keith nodded in agreement.  Harry smiled and said, “Thank you.”</p><p>During his next session, Harry did more pensieve work, this time focused on the torture he experienced at the hands of Dolores Umbridge.  That sociopathic witch was now serving a life sentence in Azkaban for her crimes during the Second Wizarding War.  After Harry had siphoned memories of his torture sessions with Umbridge, he and Hilda viewed the memories.  Hilda gasped in horror as she watched Umbridge compel Harry to write “I must not tell lies” with the Black Quill.  She cringed and teared up when she saw the blood rising to the surface of Harry’s hand as he wrote each letter in that disgusting sentence.  </p><p>Harry was deeply touched by Hilda’s reaction.  Few people knew of the pain Harry had suffered at the hands of the amoral former Hogwarts High Inquisitor.  Harry had testified at Umbridge’s trial, describing in detail the pain she had inflicted on him, and he had received many expressions of sympathy.  But this was the first time, seeing and hearing Hilda’s reaction, that Harry felt another person really understood how horrific those sessions with Umbridge had been.   </p><p>After viewing the memories in the pensieve, Hilda gave Harry a warm hug and whispered, “I’m so sorry that beast did that to you, Harry.”  He nodded, tears welling up in his eyes.</p><p>Hilda then proceeded to describe to Keith what she had witnessed.  Keith then guided Harry to do some healing work, which included naming his emotions and giving full expression to them.  Afterwards they discussed several additional options.  Keith suggested sharing some of his painful memories with one or two trusted friends so that Harry could receive additional support and affirmation.  </p><p>Keith said, “Harry, when you saw Hilda react so strongly to witnessing your traumatic experience, that had a powerful impact on you.  So it might be beneficial for you to share some of these memories with one or two of your closest friends.  This would enable your friends to really understand what you went through and be better able to provide the kind of support you need.  I suggest you think about this option and let Hilda and me know what you decide.  If you agree to this idea, whoever you choose can come in for a portion of a therapy session, and Hilda and I will guide the process.”</p><p>“Let me think about it, Keith,” Harry said.  “I can see how it might be helpful, but at this point I’m not sure who I’d want to view some of these painful memories.”</p><p>“I understand, Harry,” Keith said.  “It’s completely your decision.”  </p><p>Before Harry left the therapy office, Hilda cast a Stamina charm and brought him a cup of calming draught.  Harry thanked her for casting the charm and accepted the draught with gratitude.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Harry Reflects and Deliberates</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Harry reflects on his relationship with Draco.  He also considers Dr. Mathey's suggestion to share some of his painful memories with supportive friends.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Anxiety coursed through Harry when Draco said he was thinking about returning to Malfoy Manor.  He did not want Draco to leave the Black ancestral home.  He felt intense relief when Draco said that he preferred to stay at 12 Grimmauld Place because the manor was full of “dark memories.” </p><p>Harry realized that he had become quite fond of Draco.  He was extremely intelligent and inquisitive, well informed on a wide range of topics, and an excellent conversationalist.  Harry found that, no matter what he and Draco talked about, the conversation was stimulating and informative.  Harry was impressed by Draco’s breadth of and thirst for knowledge.  Although Harry admired Hermione’s brilliance, he often found her to be a bit pedantic.  On the other hand, he could listen to Draco speak for hours on any topic he was passionate about—the discourse was bound to be exciting and entertaining.</p><p>The topic of potions was a prime example.  It was Harry’s least favorite subject at Hogwarts, but he found himself intrigued and impressed by how much Draco knew about potions.  And Draco made the subject fascinating.  Harry thought that if Draco had been the Potions master at Hogwarts instead of Snape, Harry would have really enjoyed the class and learned so much more.</p><p>Harry couldn’t deny that he found Draco physically attractive, but he was doing a good job of managing those feelings. After all, Draco was married to Astoria Greengrass and was presumably straight as an arrow.  Harry hated when people in whom he had no interest would flirt with him and try to gain his attention, and he vowed never to act like that towards anyone, especially a heterosexual wizard.  Still, there were times when Draco’s stunning good looks would overwhelm him, and his breath would catch in his throat.  At those moments Harry would sternly chide himself, reaffirming his intention to refrain from behaving like a lovesick schoolboy.  Harry would remind himself that Draco’s friendship was what he most valued, and that any romantic or sexual feelings he had for Draco would threaten that friendship.</p><p>After his last therapy session, Harry thought about Dr. Keith Mathey’s suggestion that he share some of his painful memories with one or two close friends.  Initially he considered Hermione and Ron, who had been his closest friends for many years.  He felt some hesitancy, however, and knew he needed to figure out why.  He realized, after some reflection, that he was protecting them.  Hermione and Ron had already witnessed first-hand so many traumatic experiences in his life.  </p><p>There was significant trauma that the three Gryffindors had already shared, and Harry didn’t want to subject Hermione and Ron to taking on more of his trauma.  He remembered the time when Ron and his brothers flew the Muggle car to rescue him from the Dursleys.  He recalled hearing Ron’s voice break when he exclaimed to Molly Weasley, “But mum, they were starving him!”  Ron couldn’t bear seeing Harry in pain. Harry also recalled the tears in Hermione’s eyes when she enumerated the many painful experiences Harry had endured.  Harry knew his friends were strong and would be more than willing to witness his painful memories, but he couldn’t ask it of them.  </p><p>Harry then thought about Draco and concluded immediately that it would be too much to ask.  Draco had recently suffered so much disruption in his life.  His father committed suicide, he hosted his father’s funeral less than two weeks ago, he was separated from his wife and son, and he was living with Harry, far away from his family estate.  Harry realized that he could not ask Draco to witness his painful memories either. </p><p>At his next therapy session Harry told Keith and Hilda that he had considered asking friends to witness his painful memories but had decided against it.  He explained his reasons for not wanting to involve Ron, Hermione or Draco.  </p><p>Keith responded with a gentle challenge.  He said, “As I said last time, Harry, the decision is completely up to you, and I am not trying to pressure you in any way.  That said, there is something I’d like you to consider. My observation is that you have a habit of taking full responsibility for saving the day.  Yes, you’ve had allies who have helped you, but the burden of responsibility seems always to fall on your shoulders.  I find it interesting that when you can benefit from others’ support, you find reasons to avoid asking for it.  I admire your desire to protect your friends and your sensitivity to their distress, but I find myself wondering whether you are denying them the gift of doing something kind for you.”</p><p>Harry felt exposed, as if Keith had recognized a fundamental aspect of Harry’s character and shone a bright light on it.  Although he had been a team player in many situations, he often played a central role and felt that he had sole responsibility for the team’s success.  Prime examples included his position as Seeker on the Gryffindor Quidditch team and his leadership role in Dumbledore’s army.  </p><p>Keith’s observation that he might be denying his friends an opportunity to do something kind for him hit a nerve. He made a firm decision to have honest conversations with Hermione, Ron and Draco about what Keith had suggested.  However, he still needed to figure out how to have those conversations without making his friends feel obligated to participate.  He would need to think a lot more about that.</p>
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<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Harry Asks Hermione, Ron and Draco for Support</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Harry talks to Hermione, Ron and Draco about his pensieve work in therapy and asks if they are willing to view some of his memories.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>On a warm evening in late May, Harry apparated at Grangeley, Hermione’s and Ron’s country cottage in Kent.  He had spoken to Hermione at the Ministry a few days earlier, explaining that he wanted to discuss a personal matter with the couple.  Hermione suggested that he pop over to Grangeley for supper so that he could also see his godchildren, Hugo and Rose. </p><p>“Uncle Harry!” the children exclaimed, running up to Harry the moment he apparated.  He grabbed them both in a group hug, kissing each child on the side of the head.  “My favorite godchildren,” Harry said with a big smile. “How I’ve missed you!”  He reached into his pocket and pulled out two boxes of chocolate frogs, giving one to each child.  Their eyes widened with delight. </p><p>At that moment Hermione entered the parlor, walked over to Harry, and gave him a welcoming hug.  “Ron should be here in a minute, and we’ll dine shortly,” she said.  Looking at the children clutching their boxes of chocolate frogs, she said, “You may each have one chocolate frog after supper. Now go wash up.  We’ll be eating soon.”  </p><p>“Yes, mum,” the children said in unison before heading upstairs.  </p><p>Hermione then said to Harry, “I’ll go get supper ready and send Ron in.”</p><p>Before long Ron strolled into the parlor and greeted Harry with a warm smile. “Hello, mate! Seems like we haven’t seen each other in ages.  Hermione’s the lucky one, seeing you at the Ministry every day.”</p><p>“Hi, Ron,” Harry said, going over to his friend and giving him a big hug. “I’ve missed you.”</p><p>“So, it seems like there’s a bit of news you wanted to share with us,” Ron said.</p><p>“Yes,” Harry replied, “but let’s wait until after supper, OK? It’s a bit complicated, so maybe the three of us can have a quiet sit-down after we eat.” </p><p>“Well, now I’m intrigued,” Ron said with a smile.  “So, Hermione said that you invited Malfoy to stay with you after his dad’s suicide.  That was kind of you.  Don’t think I would have been so kind to the git after all the things he did to you.”</p><p>“Oh, Ron, we were kids then.  It’s all bygones now,” Harry replied.</p><p>“Well, maybe,” Ron said, “but I don’t think I’d be so quick to forgive.  Anyway, I assume he’s back at the manor now.”</p><p>“No, he’s still at 12 Grimmauld Place.  Actually I’m rather enjoying his company.  He was thinking about returning to the manor, but I encouraged him to stay.”</p><p>The shock on Ron’s face was plain as print. “Really?” he exclaimed. “You’re enjoying Malfoy’s company?!”</p><p>Harry felt awkward.  He knew that Ron would have a hard time understanding how his feelings for Draco had changed.  “Draco’s not the same person we knew at Hogwarts,” he said.</p><p>“Draco?” Ron blurted out. “You’re calling him Draco now?”</p><p>“Yes, Ron,” Harry said indulgently. “That’s his name, and he calls me Harry, most of the time at least.”</p><p>Ron’s eyes widened in surprise. “So, what about his company do you enjoy?” he asked, clearly having a hard time believing there would be anything enjoyable about Malfoy’s company.</p><p>Harry looked thoughtful and then said, “We have great conversations.  He’s very smart.  He's a deep thinker who is well-informed about so many things.  I learn a lot from talking to him.”</p><p>“Really,” Ron said, shaking his head. “Will wonders never cease. You and Malfoy, friends.”  He continued to shake his head.</p><p>At that moment Hermione called them into supper and shouted up the stairs to Rose and Hugo.  The food was plentiful and delicious.  Harry caught up on the latest news of the Weasley extended family.  George’s business, Wizard Wheezes in Diagon Alley, was doing very well.  George continued to invent new products that would appeal to his youthful clientele. The latest most popular item was the Elf Hat, which transformed the wearer’s face into that of a house-elf.  What people found most amusing was that the wearer somehow remained identifiable in spite of looking like a house-elf from the neck up.  Arthur and Molly were enjoying their retirement years, especially appreciating the additional time to be doting grandparents.  Hermione and Ron grumbled a bit about how Ron’s parents constantly spoiled Hugo and Rose.  Harry commiserated, saying that his own children were always less pliable after spending time with Arthur and Molly.  </p><p>After supper Hermione instructed Hugo and Rose to attend to their studies.  Harry thought how challenging it would be to have a mother who had received Outstanding grades on all her Ordinary Wizarding Levels.  He imagined that Hermione would expect her children to be as studious and as academically gifted as she was. </p><p>Hermione, Ron and Harry retired to the parlor after supper, and the time had come for Harry to talk to his best friends about the pensieve work he had been doing in therapy.  He started out by explaining how his therapy sessions had been going with Dr. Mathey and his assistant, Ms. Lancaster, who was both a psychological technician and a witch.  Harry explained Ms. Lancaster’s role in his therapy sessions.</p><p>“So, I have been seeing Keith and Hilda for almost two months now,” Harry said, “and I seem to be making good progress.  We have been using a pensieve to retrieve, view, and work through some of my painful past memories.  It has been a difficult but rewarding process.”</p><p>“I expect so,” Hermione said. “I’m proud of you, Harry, for sticking with it.”</p><p>Harry nodded and continued.  “Recently I revisited a particularly difficult memory.  When Hilda viewed the memory in the pensieve, it affected her deeply.  Her reaction and subsequent words to me were healing.  Keith then suggested it might benefit my healing process for some close friends to view some of my painful memories and share their reactions with me.  I was reluctant to ask you because it’s not exactly a pleasant business.  I didn’t want to subject you to any more distress than I already have through the years.  And I certainly don’t want you to feel obligated.  It’s perfectly fine if you’d rather not.”</p><p>“Don’t be ridiculous, Harry,” Hermione huffed. “Of course we’ll do it! How could you possibly have any doubt?  Seriously, I can’t believe you sometimes.”</p><p>Harry looked down with a sheepish expression.  </p><p>Ron added, “We’re your best friends, mate.  You know we’ll do anything we can to help you.”</p><p>“Thank you,” Harry said softly.  “You’re the best.”</p><p>*****</p><p>Harry decided to talk to Draco the following day after work.  After dinner the two wizards retired to the drawing room and settled comfortably in overstuffed chairs in front of the fireplace. Harry decided to take the plunge. “There’s something I’ve been meaning to tell you, Draco,” he said. Draco looked up inquiringly at Harry.  This wasn’t how Harry usually started their conversations.</p><p>“I have been seeing a Muggle psychologist for almost two months now,” Harry said. Draco raised his eyebrows in surprise.  He inclined his head, waiting for Harry to continue.</p><p>Harry explained how he came to be a client of Dr. Mathey, who knew all about the magical world and was respected in wizarding healing circles.  Harry also explained that Dr. Mathey worked with Ms. Lancaster, who was both a psychological technician and a witch. </p><p>Draco was stunned, but also intrigued. “Is it helping?” he asked.</p><p>“Very much,” Harry said.  “I’ve been plagued by all kinds of demons since childhood, and then I went through so many horrible things before and during the Second Wizarding War.  My sessions with Keith and Hilda are helping me sort out a lot of my past.”</p><p>Draco nodded and said, “If you don’t mind me asking a rather personal question, can you give me an example of something you’re sorting out?”</p><p>Harry pondered for a moment and then said, “I don’t mind at all, Draco.  After Voldemort killed my parents, my mother’s sister and her husband took me in.  But they were never kind to me, in fact they abused me.  They kept me in a tiny cupboard under the stairs and essentially made me their servant.  They also withheld food from me, so I was always starving.”</p><p>Draco’s eyes widened in shock. “Oh my god, Harry. I’m so sorry, I had no idea.” In a flash of awareness he said, “That’s why you always carried food around with you at Hogwarts! I always thought that was so odd. It all makes sense now.” </p><p>Harry grinned and said, “Yeah, at the Dursleys—that’s my aunt and uncle’s surname—I never knew if and when I’d get to eat again, so I got into the habit of keeping a small stash of food, whenever I could get my hands on it.”</p><p>Draco couldn’t stop shaking his head, thinking about how different their childhoods had been.  While Harry had been starving in a tiny cupboard under the stairs, Draco had been feasting on delicious meals prepared by house-elves in the expansive rooms of the affluent manor.</p><p>“So in therapy you’re sorting through those kinds of painful experiences,” Draco observed.</p><p>Harry nodded.  “Yes, we’re working with a pensieve.  I siphon memories and then we work through them.  It’s hard to describe how the process works, but the healing seems to be the result of facing the pain directly in the presence of caring and supportive people, and giving honest expression to the thoughts and feelings that come up.” </p><p>Harry took a deep breath and then said, “Which brings me to why I wanted to tell you about my therapy.”</p><p>Draco gave Harry an inquisitive look, silently encouraging him to continue.</p><p>“Keith suggested that it might be beneficial to have a trusted friend view some of my memories and share their reactions with me.  He saw how I reacted when Hilda shared an emotional response to one of my particularly painful memories.  It was healing to see Hilda’s response.  So, I was wondering if you would be willing to view some of my memories, Draco.  I didn’t want to ask you because I know the memories can be jarring, and you’ve been through so much lately.  So please tell me honestly if you’d rather not.  I know it’s a lot to ask."</p><p>Draco was deeply moved by Harry’s request.  Did Harry really consider him a trusted friend? The thought induced a feeling of euphoria in him.  Without missing a beat, Draco said, “Of course I’ll do it, Harry.  I feel very honored that you asked.”</p>
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<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Hermione and Ron View Harry's Memory of Dementors</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Hermione and Ron come to Harry's therapy session and view his memory of dementors at Hogwarts.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Harry had made arrangements with Dr. Mathey for Hermione and Ron to join his next therapy session.  Keith warmly welcomed the couple and introduced them to Hilda.  He explained what their role was and how the session would proceed—Hermione and Ron would view selected memories that Harry had siphoned into the pensieve and then share with Harry any thoughts and feelings they wished to share.  Keith alerted the couple to the fact that viewing another person’s painful memories can be distressing, sometimes to the point of vicarious traumatization.  He assured them that he and Hilda would monitor the process and interrupt it if they observed any signs of excessive distress.  Keith also stated that he and Hilda would provide any support or debriefing the couple might need after viewing Harry’s memories.</p><p>Harry had chosen a specific memory for Hermione and Ron to view.  The memory was from the Quidditch match between Gryffindor and Hufflepuff during their third year at Hogwarts.  Harry was soaring on his broomstick, eyes scanning all around him trying to catch a glimpse of the golden snitch, intent on finding it before Cedric Digory, the Hufflepuff seeker.  Suddenly the sky was filled with dementors and a wave of despair crashed over him.  Harry had never before in his life felt so hopeless and so afraid.  The unrelenting anguish was so overwhelming that he wasn’t able to maintain consciousness.  All he remembered after that was a sense of letting go and plummeting.  After he came to and realized that he had fallen from such a great height, he was amazed that he was still alive.</p><p>Hermione grabbed Ron’s hand as she viewed Harry’s memory.  “Oh, Harry,” she whispered, “how horrible.  I knew it was bad, but I didn’t know how bad.”  </p><p>Tears were streaming down Ron’s face, which was the most shocking thing Harry had seen in ages.  </p><p>“Mate, you are the strongest wizard who ever lived!” Ron exclaimed. “I can’t believe everything you survived when you were just a kid. I don’t tell you often enough that you are completely awesome.” </p><p>Harry blushed and didn’t know what to say.</p><p>“Group hug?” Hermione suggested.  The three Gryffindors stood up and held each other tightly. </p><p>“I wish I had been more aware of what you were going through then, Harry,” Hermione said. “And if I had been a more powerful witch, I could have helped you more.”</p><p>“Oh, c’mon Hermione,” Harry said with a chuckle.  “I wouldn’t have survived without you and Ron watching my back. Think of all the times we worked together to deal with completely impossible situations.  The three of us were a team, and we fought the good fight.  Besides, if you had been any more powerful back then, you’d have been intolerable.” </p><p>Ron laughed heartily. “Yeah, can you imagine Hermione back in the day being as powerful as she is now? It was bad enough that she ran circles around us on our OWLs.” </p><p>Harry said with a smile, “At least she didn’t rub it in.” </p><p>“Honestly you two,” Hermione said affectionately.</p><p>Keith interjected then.  He said, “Harry, can you tell us what it was like to have Hermione and Ron view your memory and share their responses with you?”</p><p>“It was amazing to view that memory with my two best friends,” Harry said with sincerity.  “I didn’t feel so alone—it was almost like they were actually there with me, and that was comforting.  So the memory lost a lot of power.  Now when I think of that experience, I can picture Hermione and Ron with me.”</p><p>Harry took a deep breath and continued, “And when Hermione said she wished she could have helped more, and Ron called me the strongest wizard alive, I realized how lucky I am to have such brilliant friends who will always have my back.  I’m beyond grateful.  I love you two so much.”</p><p>“We love you back, Harry,” Hermione said. </p><p>“You’ll always be my best mate,” Ron said.</p><p>Hilda spoke up then.  “I have a suggestion,” she said.  “Even though we viewed only a memory of dementors and thankfully not the actual phenomena, the memory can cause some feelings of despair, hopelessness and anguish.  I think it may be helpful for all four of us to cast our patronuses to counteract any of those negative feelings.”</p><p>“Great idea, Hilda,” Keith said emphatically.  “Any objections?” </p><p>The wizards and witches all shook their heads.  “OK then, go for it,” Keith said.</p><p>Within moments, the room was brightly illuminated by four patronuses—Harry’s stag, Hermione’s otter, Ron’s Jack Russell terrier, and Hilda’s panda.  It was a beautiful sight, and the spirit of everyone in the room was lifted. Even Keith, who did not have magic, felt an increased sense of joy and well-being.</p>
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<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Draco Views Harry's Memory of Cedric Diggory's Murder</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Harry asks Draco to view his memory of Cedric Diggory's murder.  Draco agrees, and the two wizards share an emotional moment.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>At his next therapy session, Harry talked to Dr. Mathey and Ms. Lancaster about his readiness to do some grief work.  In less than 30 years Harry had experienced so many tragic losses.  Many of his loved ones had been violently killed—his parents, Sirius, Remus, Nymphadora, Fred . . .  the list went on and on.  Harry told Keith and Hilda that he hadn’t coped very well with these losses and he knew he had a lot of “unfinished business” regarding death. </p><p>Keith shared his perspective with Harry, saying, “There is often the unreasonable expectation that we grieve quickly and move on.  I expect that is true not just of the British Muggle culture but also of the British magical culture.  The idea that time heals all wounds, and something is wrong with us if we’re still grieving after a lot of time has passed.   But that perspective isn’t helpful to someone who’s grieving.”</p><p>Harry expressed his understanding with a nod, and Keith continued.  “Grief isn’t the problem.  Grief reflects how important a relationship is to us.  The more important the relationship, the deeper the grief.  I’d like you to think of your grief as honoring the relationships you are grieving, honoring the people you lost.  Think about how to grieve well, acknowledging what you have lost and expressing the feelings associated with that loss.  The goal is to grieve well, as opposed to not grieving at all.”</p><p>“I never considered that before,” Harry admitted.  “It makes sense, but I hate grieving--it hurts too goddamn much.”</p><p>“Yes, it does hurt,” Keith agreed.  “Unfortunately the pain is unavoidable.  It’s particularly difficult when someone has died by violence.  The emotions are so complex, intense and frightening—sadness, anger, rage, impotence, desire for vengeance.  So, of course it’s natural and normal to avoid those difficult emotions and sometimes we have to give ourselves a break from them.  That’s why self-care and social support are so important when we’re doing intensive grief work.”</p><p>Harry said, “I think I have been avoiding the pain for too long.  One sign is that recently I have had recurring dreams about people who have died.  I wake up feeling intensely sad, then try to shake it off as quickly as I can and get on with my day.  I think my dreams are trying to tell me that I need to allow myself to grieve more.”</p><p>“That’s a good insight, Harry,” Keith said.  “Why don’t we embark on some grief work then? You get to choose the focus and the pace of the work.  Do you have an idea of where and how you’d like to start?”</p><p>“Well, I had an idea.  My friend Draco has expressed willingness to view some of my memories, like Ron and Hermione did last time.  I was thinking about asking Draco to view my memory of witnessing the death of a person I cared about.  I can’t explain it, but I have this strong feeling that Draco is the one person who can help me deal with that memory.  I don’t know exactly why.  A big reservation I have, however, is that Draco’s father died not long ago, and I don’t want my memory to trigger his own grief about his father’s death.”</p><p>Keith asked gently, “Can you be upfront with Draco about your hunch that he can help with this particular memory, as well as your concern that it might be triggering for him?”</p><p>Harry pondered for a moment, then said, “Yes, I think I can talk to him about it.  If Draco and I agree to go ahead, I’ll call and give you a heads-up.”</p><p>*****</p><p>That evening after supper, Harry talked to Draco about what he and Keith had discussed in his therapy session earlier in the day.</p><p>“I can’t explain it, Draco,” Harry said, “but I keep wanting you to view this particular memory of mine.  It’s as though you’re the only person who can help me with it.  The problem is that the memory is very disturbing—it’s when I witnessed the death of our schoolmate, Cedric Diggory.  And apart from being concerned about how awful the memory is, I’m also aware that you recently lost your father. So I worry about how viewing the memory might exacerbate your own grief.” </p><p>Draco was touched by Harry’s concern.  He also wondered why Harry wanted him to view this particular memory. Of course Draco knew Cedric, but they had never been close.  As seekers on opposing Quidditch teams, they had been athletic rivals, but there was never the animosity between them that had characterized Draco’s and Harry’s rivalry. Nor was there the friendliness and camaraderie that Harry and Cedric seemed to enjoy.  Draco felt some remorse recalling how cliquish and standoffish he had been during his youth.  Spending all his time with Crabbe and Goyle when he could’ve been getting to know impressive wizards like Cedric. </p><p>Draco remembered learning of Cedric’s death and attending his memorial service.  Reflecting on that period in his life, he also realized that he didn’t understand the enormity of the tragedy back then.  Death hadn’t yet touched Draco personally.  During his fourth year at Hogwarts, Draco still possessed that teenage feeling of invincibility and immortality.  Thinking about Cedric’s death now, he was struck by how devastating it must have been to his family and friends, and especially to Harry.  The least Draco could do would be to view Harry’s memory of the tragedy with him.</p><p>“Of course I’ll view the memory with you, Harry,” Draco said. “And no worries about my grief about my dad.  I think I’m coping with that pretty well.”</p><p>“Well, if you’re sure, Draco,” Harry said tentatively.</p><p>“Without a doubt,” Draco replied with conviction.</p><p>*****</p><p>Harry and Draco apparated a short distance from the therapy center and walked in companionable silence to Dr. Mathey’s office.   Having not been in Muggle London for some time, Draco was looking around, drinking in all the sights and sounds.  It was his very first time in a Muggle therapy office, and he was fascinated by all the Muggle objects, including the décor and the technology.  He had entered a different culture, and everything looked so new and different to the pureblood wizard.</p><p>Keith greeted Harry and Draco in the waiting room and escorted them into his office.  He introduced Draco and Hilda, then explained the process of viewing Harry’s memories, the potential risks, and the safeguards in place, just as he had with Hermione and Ron two weeks earlier. </p><p>Harry then began siphoning memories into the pensieve.  When he was finished, the wizards and witch began viewing Harry’s memory of the last moments of the Triwizard Tournament during Draco’s and Harry’s fourth year at Hogwarts.  They watched Harry searching the maze for the Triwizard Cup and saw him save Cedric from Viktor Krum’s Cruciatus curse.  They watched how Harry and Cedric found the cup after teaming up to stun the giant spider that had attacked Cedric.  </p><p>Draco started to weep when he saw how Cedric and Harry had argued, each of them claiming that the other deserved to win the tournament, and how they eventually agreed to claim the victory as a team.  Never before had he witnessed two teenagers exhibiting that much integrity, generosity and sportsmanship.  In that moment Draco glimpsed what his own relationship with Harry might have been like back then, and he was overcome by a feeling of sadness.</p><p>Harry, Draco and Hilda wept profusely when they viewed Peter Pettigrew murder Cedric with Voldemort’s wand in the Little Hangleton graveyard.  Draco gasped in astonishment when he saw Cedric’s shadow emerge from Voldemort’s wand and watched Harry transport Cedric’s body and the Triwizard Cup back to Hogwarts. The tears were streaming down the faces of the wizards and witch as they watched Harry cling to Cedric's body, crying and screaming.</p><p>Harry, Draco and Hilda looked away from the pensieve, overcome with emotion and unable to speak. Keith looked at them with concern. “Hilda,” he said, “do we need a magical intervention at this point?  It’s clear that was an intensely powerful and extremely painful memory.” </p><p>“Yes,” Hilda replied, “I just need a moment.”  She closed her eyes and took a minute or two to compose herself.  She then said, “I was initially tempted to cast a soothing charm and to rush out and bring us all cups of calming draught.  But then I realized that it would be better not to blunt our responses to Harry’s memory before sharing those responses.”</p><p>Keith nodded.  “Makes sense,” he said, “but let me check in on Harry and Draco first.  How are the two of you doing?  Would it be OK to talk before using magic to soothe the emotional reactions?”</p><p>When both Draco and Harry agreed that would be OK, Keith said, “I’ll start with you, Harry.  What was it like to revisit that painful memory?”</p><p>“Incredibly hard,” he said. “To be honest, I’m feeling pretty wiped out now.  What made it especially awful was that I knew what was coming, and I couldn’t do anything to stop it.  Like watching a Muggle film when you know that it’s going to end horribly.  You want to change the ending, but you know you can’t.  You feel so powerless.”</p><p>“Any other thoughts or feelings you would like to share about the memory, Harry?” Keith asked.</p><p>Harry started to cry then.  Between sobs he said, “Just how much I loved Cedric.  He was the sweetest, kindest, most generous boy I ever met.  If he had lived, I know we would have become the best of friends.  It was such a huge loss for me.  I’ll miss him for the rest of my life.”</p><p>Tears were streaming down Draco’s cheeks, as he reached over and pulled Harry into a tight hug. “I’m so sorry, Harry.  I wish I could have been there for you.  I’m here for you now.”</p><p>Harry clutched onto Draco and cried into his shoulder. Draco kept whispering in Harry’s ear.  “I could see how much you loved and admired Cedric, Harry, and even though I viewed your memory I can’t imagine the kind of pain you experienced.  I’m awestruck, Harry, by how brave you were, how much strength and integrity you had, and you were just a kid.  I wish I had known back then how incredible you were.  The love and admiration you had for Cedric—well that’s how I feel towards you now.”</p><p>Harry felt the healing power of Draco’s words wash over him.  He continued to cry into Draco’s shoulder but a sense of comfort began to moderate his feelings of grief and despair. It made sense to him now why he had wanted so much for Draco to view this particular memory.  He had known on an intuitive level that Draco could and would provide the comfort he needed. </p><p>Keith facilitated the remainder of Harry’s therapy session, eliciting additional thoughts and feelings from Harry, Draco and Hilda.  Draco told Harry how much he admired the sportsmanship Harry and Cedric had displayed in the Triwizard Tournament and expressed his regret that, in contrast, his own relationship with Harry had always been so hostile and competitive. </p><p>By this time Harry’s spirit had lightened sufficiently to tease Draco.  He said, “Does that mean you won’t sneer at me anymore and say, ‘Scared, Potter?’”</p><p>Draco laughed then. “Well, even if I do say it, you will always sneer back and say, ‘You wish.’”</p><p>The wizards grinned at each other.  </p><p>Keith then ensured that Harry, Draco and Hilda felt comfortable ending the session.  Hilda brought in cups of calming draught for everyone, including Keith, after which she cast a Stamina charm.  After finishing their cups of the draught, Harry and Draco disapparated back to 12 Grimmauld Place.</p>
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<a name="section0015"><h2>15. At 12 Grimmauld Place after the Therapy Session</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>After Harry's therapy session, Harry and Draco spend the evening together at 12 Grimmauld Place.  Something happens.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Harry couldn’t stop thinking about how Draco wept while viewing his memory of Cedric Diggory’s murder.  And how Draco had hugged him, saying he loved and admired him.  Harry recalled how he felt with the Slytherin’s arms around him—comforted and safe.  And how his heart leapt when Draco said he loved him.  Also echoing in Harry’s mind were Draco’s words, “I’m here for you now.”  </p><p>Harry knew that in that moment his relationship with Draco had gone to the next level.  This frightened him not a little. It would be so easy to fall in love with the stunning Slytherin with his beautiful white blond hair and silver eyes.  And that wouldn’t do at all. Even though Draco and Astoria were currently separated, they were still married, and all the evidence suggested that Draco was straight.  </p><p>Harry kept telling himself, “Don’t fuck up this friendship.” He resolved to keep his strong feelings for Draco in check, all the while continuing to treat the other wizard with kindness and affection.  He couldn’t in good conscience distance emotionally from Draco just because he was attracted to him.  No, Harry would not refrain from expressing appreciation to Draco for his friendship and emotional support.  But perhaps he could control his impulses to admire Draco’s long, lithe, and surprisingly strong body.  </p><p>“Draco, I can’t thank you enough for what you did today,” Harry said after they had apparated back at 12 Grimmauld Place.  “You don’t know how much you helped, how much comfort you gave me.”</p><p>“You’re welcome, Harry,” Draco replied. “I wanted to ease your pain and wasn’t sure what to do,” he admitted.</p><p>“What you did was perfect,” Harry said. “You did ease my pain, and I’m forever grateful.  If there’s anything I can ever do to help you out, all you have to do is ask.”</p><p>“Oh, Harry,” Draco replied, “you saved my butt at my trial and kept me from being sentenced to Azkaban.  I think I could be repaying that debt for the rest of my life.”</p><p>“Let’s consider that debt paid in full then,” Harry said with a smile.</p><p>That evening Kreacher and Roody served the wizards a delicious supper of roast chicken, boiled potatoes, peas and cauliflower.  After eating their fill Harry and Draco retired to the drawing room, as was their custom.  Acknowledging that viewing Harry’s memory earlier that day had been emotionally draining, Harry and Draco fortified themselves with glasses of Ogden’s Old Firewhisky.  They also agreed that listening to music would be soothing and decided to listen to a Celestina Warbeck concert on the Wizarding Wireless Network.</p><p>Draco lay on the sofa in the drawing room, while Harry sat on the floor, his back leaning against the edge of the sofa.  The wizards continued to sip firewhisky throughout the concert, eyes closed as they listened enrapt to Celestina’s beautiful voice singing hit song after hit song.  After the last song they remained silent.  Harry was enjoying the slight buzzed sensation from the Firewhisky when he felt Draco’s hand on the top of his head, gently running his fingers through Harry’s hair.  The Gryffindor froze. He was confused about what was happening and didn’t know how to respond.  Eventually he just said, “Draco?”</p><p>Draco immediately removed his hand from the top of Harry’s head.  Again Harry said, “Draco? What’s going on?”</p><p>After a few beats Draco said, “Sorry, Harry.  I – I just felt the need to touch you.  Didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”</p><p>The wizards were facing away from each other so neither could see the expression on the other’s face.  </p><p>Harry replied, “You didn’t make me feel uncomfortable, Draco.  I just don’t know what’s happening here.  Is it the firewhisky?”</p><p>“No,” Draco admitted, “although that may have given me the courage to do it, but I’ve been wanting to touch you for a while now.”</p><p>“Oh,” Harry said, dumbfounded.  He was silent for a few moments before asking the question that was on his mind.  “Just wanted to touch my hair, or more?”</p><p>Draco took a deep breath and said, “I don’t know.  It felt so good to hug you at my dad’s funeral and earlier today at the therapist’s office.  It felt right, you know?  The physical contact, I mean.”</p><p>A wave of anxiety washed over Harry.  If the physical contact between him and Draco were to increase, it would be harder for Harry to keep his sexual attraction to Draco in check.  And yet he longed for Draco’s touch.  Eventually he said, “Our hugs felt so good to me too, Draco, and I’m fine with more physical contact.  I guess I’m more comfortable letting you initiate though.”  Deciding in the moment to be more honest, he added, “You know I’m gay, so I’m likely to be more open than you to certain kinds of physical contact, and I don’t want to cross your boundaries.  That’s why I think it’s better if you do the initiating.” </p><p>Draco was shocked by what Harry said.  So Harry was open to “certain kinds of physical contact” with him, which clearly implied sex.  The thought of having sex with Harry had never before entered his conscious mind.  What did he think and how did he feel about that prospect?  Draco was now more confused than he had been before.  He needed time to sort everything out.  </p><p>“OK, that sounds fair, Harry,” was all he was able to manage.  Then, realizing that he needed time and space by himself, he said, “Maybe we can share a goodnight hug then?”</p><p>The wizards gave each other a warm hug then and headed to their bedrooms.</p>
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<a name="section0016"><h2>16. Draco's Conscious and Unconscious Actions</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>After running his fingers through Harry's hair, Draco makes a number of choices. Some of the actions he takes are conscious, others are unconscious.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ensconced in his bedroom Draco continued to think about what had just happened.  He stripped off all his clothes and lay on his bed, but he knew he wouldn’t be able to sleep for a while.  He found himself luxuriating in the sensual feeling of being naked on top of his silver satin sheets.  He wondered what it would be like to take things further with Harry.  He imagined them kissing.  The image didn’t bother him.  Instead it intrigued him. What would it be like to kiss Harry?  </p><p>Draco then thought about how it had felt to hold Harry close, pressing their bodies together.  He imagined them in a tight embrace, kissing.  He started to get hard.  He pictured Harry stripped down to his boxers and then imagined himself touching Harry’s half-naked body.  His pulse started racing and his breath quickened.  At that point Draco began to touch himself as he let his imagination run wild, producing image after image of himself pleasuring every inch of Harry’s body with his mouth and hands. Draco reached his climax spurting jizz all over his naked chest.  Casting a tergeo spell to clean himself up, he thought, “I am so screwed.”</p><p>Meanwhile, Harry lay awake recalling the feeling of Draco’s hand in his hair. He had been tempted to throw himself at Draco and pull him into a passionate kiss, but of course he couldn’t do that.  Harry knew he had to proceed very cautiously.  The risk of getting hurt was huge. Maybe Draco was just feeling overly emotional after the intense therapy session today.  Maybe viewing Harry’s memory had elicited a strong desire in Draco to comfort and protect Harry, and that’s why he was running his fingers through Harry’s hair.  That was something a parent did to soothe a child, right? It couldn’t have come from any romantic or sexual impulses, could it?  It didn’t matter anyway because Draco was married, and no way would Harry get involved with a married wizard.  He ruminated about this for hours before finally falling into a restless sleep.</p><p>The next morning the wizards were a little shy with each other.  Harry continued to ruminate about what Draco might be thinking and feeling, and Draco was acutely aware that last night he had pleasured himself fantasizing about sex with Harry.  Each man was relieved that the other man did not refer to what had happened the night before. As usual they breakfasted together and then disapparated for the Ministry of Magic, where they headed their separate ways. </p><p>Sitting in his office in the Department of Magical Artefacts, Draco took some time to think things through.  He needed to sort out his feelings for Harry, as well as his feelings for Astoria.  His marriage had been on the rocks for a long time now. Truth be told, they had never been a perfect match.  Astoria was beautiful, no doubt about that, and they looked good together.  Everyone said they made a handsome couple.  His parents had approved the marriage because she was a pureblood witch.  But Draco and Astoria didn’t have anything in common except that they were both pureblood, and their relationship was characterized by a civility, a cordiality that had always left Draco feeling cold and dissatisfied.  He had always been a passionate, highly emotional wizard, who had often had to repress his passionate feelings.  But lately, living with Harry, he had felt more alive than he had felt in a long time.  Draco realized that he needed to talk to Astoria soon.  He decided he would try to see her in Edinburgh during his lunch hour.  </p><p>When lunchtime came, Draco apparated right at the front door of the Edinburgh house belonging to Astoria’s Aunt Isabella.   It was a stunning five-bedroom stone house in the Blacket Conservation Area of Edinburgh, with a slated roof and five large case windows facing the street.  Draco realized that he was arriving unannounced.  He knocked loudly on the door.  He was greeted by Timsy, one of Isabella’s house-elves.  </p><p>“Greetings, Master Draco,” Timsy said. “Please do come in.  Timsy will inform Astoria and Scorpius that you have arrived.” </p><p>“Thank you, Timsy,” Draco said, “but I am not expected.  Please do not trouble Scorpius but do ask Lady Astoria if she is free to see me.” </p><p>“Very good, Master Draco,” Timsy said, “Timsy will do as you asked.  Please follow me and make yourself comfortable in the parlor.”  Draco followed the house-elf and seated himself in a comfortable chair.</p><p>Before long Astoria entered the parlor and greeted him.  “This is a surprise, Draco.  To what do I owe the pleasure?” she said politely.  She sat down in a nearby chair and faced her husband.</p><p>“I’m sorry to barge in on you like this, Astoria,” Draco said, “but I had an urgent need to talk to you about our marriage.” </p><p>Astoria looked puzzled.  “Why so urgent all of a sudden?  Why now?” she asked.</p><p>“We haven’t been happy for a long time, Astoria,” Draco said with a sigh. “I suppose that I came to the sudden realization that I don’t see us ever getting back together again, and we’ve been dragging it on, postponing the inevitable.  It became clear to me that it’s never going to work.  I mean, you’ve been living here in Edinburgh for more than four months now, and in all that time we have hardly spoken to each other except to exchange a few pleasantries when I drop in to see Scorpius.  And to be brutally honest, I haven’t missed you, so that tells me something.”</p><p>Astoria nodded. With a tone of resignation she said, “To be brutally honest, Draco, I haven’t missed you either. I guess that means it’s over.” </p><p>“So, we’ll have to figure out what to do next,” Draco said softly. “I think we can come up with an arrangement that’s acceptable to both of us regarding division of property and custody of Scorpius.”</p><p>“Yes, I’m sure we can come to an agreement, Draco,” Astoria said, sounding a bit sad.  “We were always civil with each other. I can’t imagine that will change now.” </p><p>“How shall we tell Scorpius?” Draco asked. “I’m not ready to tell him this moment, but we do need to explain things to him soon.  Do you want us to tell him together or separately?” </p><p>“Let me think about that, OK?” Astoria replied. “I won’t take long, just a day or so and I’ll get back to you.  Please feel free to apparate here at any time.  I will let Isabella and the house-elves know that you will be coming more frequently in the next few weeks. We have a lot to figure out.”</p><p>She stood up from her chair.  Draco rose too and pulled her into a hug.  Tears welled up in Draco’s eyes and a single tear rolled down Astoria’s cheek.  “Goodbye, Draco,” she said. “Goodbye, Astoria,” Draco replied before he broke away from the hug and disapparated.</p><p>At the end of the workday, Draco met Harry in the ministry lobby.  “I need a drink, Harry,” he said. “Go with me to the Leaky Cauldron?”</p><p>“Sure,” Harry replied, “what’s up?”</p><p>“I’ll tell you at the tavern,” Draco said.</p><p>They walked in companionable silence to the Leaky Cauldron and found a secluded table in a quiet corner.  The after-work crowd had not yet descended on the tavern.  Harry ordered a pint, and Draco ordered a double-shot of Firewhisky.  </p><p>“Rough day?” Harry said, looking at Draco with concern.</p><p>“You could say that,” Draco replied.  “I went to Edinburgh on my lunch break.  Astoria and I decided to get a divorce.”</p><p>“I’m so sorry, Draco,” Harry said softly.</p><p>“Don’t be,” Draco said.  “We’d been postponing the inevitable.  Remember when you asked me a while ago if I missed her? And I said no? Well, she hasn’t been missing me either and that speaks volumes about our relationship.  We haven’t been affectionate to each other or had a meaningful conversation in years.  What’s the point in being married then?”</p><p>“It sounds like what happened to me and Ginny,” Harry said. “We stopped talking and drifted apart. It hurt.  I’m sorry it happened to you and Astoria.  On the outside you looked like you were made for each other.”  </p><p>Draco laughed then, a little bitterly.  “Yes, two good-looking purebloods.  A match made in heaven.  My parents were so happy when we got engaged.  Looking back I see we got married because we were expected to.  But we never had any chemistry.  It was almost like living with a stranger—we were always so civil, so polite to each other, like an emotionless business arrangement.  But we both fell in love with Scorpius when he came along.  He bonded us for a while but that just wasn’t enough for us to last.  And now we’re going to have to figure out how to share custody.”</p><p>“I can help you figure out your side of things. You told me at Dr. Mathey’s office that you are here for me,” Harry said earnestly.  “Well, I’m here for you too, Draco.  Anything you need, just tell me and it’s yours.”</p><p>“Thank you, Harry,” Draco said, looking intently into Harry’s emerald eyes.  “You’re a good friend.”</p><p>After they disapparated from the Leaky Cauldron and were back at 12 Grimmauld Place, they talked about custody arrangements.  Draco asked Harry about the custody agreement he had with Ginny.  Harry explained that Ginny and their children were living in Whimple in Devon, not far from the Weasley family home in Ottery St. Catchpole. </p><p>He said, “Ginny and I decided that James, Albus and Lily were better off staying with their mum in Whimple, rather than shuttling them back and forth between Whimple and London.  That way they get to enjoy the wide open spaces of the countryside, which they are now accustomed to, as well as the proximity to their grandparents whom they love.”</p><p>“But when do you get to see your kids, Harry?” Draco asked.</p><p>“Not as much as I like,” Harry admitted.  “But I try to apparate at the Whimple house at least once a week for lunch with the kids and spend at least one day each weekend with them.  They have stayed here a few times since the divorce, but it’s been a while since their last visit.  I think they find this ancestral home a bit gloomy and spooky, and they miss the beauty of the countryside.”</p><p>“I think it’s going to be hard sharing custody with Astoria,” Draco said with a sigh.  “I miss Scorpius so much. I should have seen him today, but I was too broken up after ending things with Astoria.  I have to go back and see him tomorrow or the next day.”</p><p>Harry nodded and said, “Maybe you can ask Astoria if it’s OK for Scorpius to come stay with us for a while.  Would you like that?” </p><p>Draco’s face lit up at the possibility. “I would love that, Harry,” he said. “Are you sure that would be OK?”</p><p>“Of course,” Harry replied. “It would be awesome to have the little wizard around.  Maybe someday he can meet my Albus.  I think they’re about the same age.”</p><p>“That would be brilliant,” Draco said.  A joyful image popped into his head--he and Harry reading bedtime stories to their sons.</p>
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<a name="section0017"><h2>17. Harry's and Draco's Relationship Deepens</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Harry talks to Keith about his relationship with Draco.  Draco works things out with Astoria and enjoys time with Scorpius.  The wizards spend the evening together at 12 Grimmauld Place.  Things happen.</p>
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    <p>At his next therapy session Harry asked Keith if he could take a break from the trauma work and talk about something else that had been on his mind.</p><p>“Of course, Harry,” Keith said, “this is your time.  We can talk about whatever you want.  So what’s on your mind?”</p><p>Harry took a deep breath and said, “Well, it’s about my relationship with Draco.  I’ve been feeling confused about it and, frankly, obsessing a bit.” He proceeded to provide Keith with pertinent details about his marriage to Ginny, coming to terms with being gay, his affair with Eoin, and the history of his relationship with Draco.</p><p>Keith listened intently to Harry’s narrative, and then said, “Harry, you started out by saying you were confused about your relationship with Draco and obsessing about it.  Tell me what is confusing to you?”</p><p>“I like him,” Harry began tentatively.  “I like him a lot.  We’ve gotten so close in the last couple of months, and I love having him around.  And I’m sexually attracted to him.  I can’t stop thinking about him.  But he’s straight, which sucks.  So I have worked hard to keep my feelings for him in check.  But then the night after my last therapy session, we were sitting in the drawing room drinking firewhisky and he ran his fingers through my hair.  And that freaked me out.”</p><p>Keith interjected then, “He ran his fingers through your hair.  Tell me more about that, Harry.  What exactly happened?”</p><p>Harry described the scene for Keith and related blow by blow what transpired. </p><p>“So you talked after he touched your hair,” Keith reflected, “but you didn’t feel resolved after that talk.</p><p>“No, I don’t know where I stand with him,” Harry said.  “I don’t want to be in love with him, I really don’t.  But if I’m honest with myself, I have to admit that I do love Draco.  What a cliché, falling in love with a straight wizard.  And I don’t want to fuck up the friendship we have.”</p><p>“What are you afraid might happen, Harry?” Keith asked.</p><p>“That I’ll tell Draco how I feel and he’ll end the friendship,” Harry admitted.</p><p>“So telling him would be a big risk,” Keith observed.</p><p>“Huge.  I don’t want to lose him,” Harry said. “I’ve been so happy since he started living with me.  I love hanging out with him, whether we’re having a great conversation, or just hanging out listening to music, or unwinding at the tavern, or enjoying a meal together.  Being with Draco is the highlight of my day.  When I’m at work, I look forward to spending the evening with him.  I miss him when he’s not around.”</p><p>“Is there anything you could tell Draco about your feelings that would feel less risky than saying ‘I’m in love with you’?” Keith asked.</p><p>Harry gave this question some thought before responding.  “I guess I could tell him that I really enjoy his company, and that I’d like him to stay at my place indefinitely,” Harry said.</p><p>“So that would be less risky than saying “I love you,” Keith reflected.</p><p>“Yeah, it would still be hard, but not nearly as hard as admitting that I’m in love with him,” Harry replied.</p><p>“What, if anything, might make it easier for you to tell Draco you love him?” Keith asked.</p><p>“I don’t know,” Harry replied.</p><p>“Give it some thought, Harry,” Keith encouraged.</p><p>Harry was silent for a few moments, then said, “Well, the obvious answer is if he told me he loved me first, but that’s not going to happen.”</p><p>Keith decided then to challenge Harry gently.  He said, “You told me that Draco said he had the urge to touch you. And that physical contact between you felt right to him.  That suggests to me that he has deep feelings for you.  I’m not saying that he’s in love with you, only Draco can know that.  But from what you’ve told me, it seems unlikely that he’ll reject you if you disclose at least some of your feelings for him.  I’m not suggesting that you declare your undying love for him.  But maybe you can tell him that you have strong feelings for him and are attracted to him?  Would that perhaps be worth the risk?”</p><p>“That’s really scary,” Harry said.</p><p>“Scarier than facing Voldemort?” Keith said, raising an eyebrow.</p><p>“Almost,” Harry said with a grin.</p><p>“So, yes, it’s a scary prospect to tell Draco how you feel,” Keith acknowledged.  “If you were to disclose some of your feelings to him, is there a way you could do it that would feel less scary?”</p><p>Harry closed his eyes and thought for a bit.  He then looked at Keith and said, “I suppose I could say that I have feelings for him and understand that he doesn’t reciprocate those feelings, which is fine, and I will of course respect his boundaries and want him to stay at my place.” </p><p>“OK, so you have several options, Harry,” Keith summarized.  “You can say and do nothing, that’s always an option.  On the other end of the continuum is full disclosure.  Then in between those two options you can tell him you enjoy his company and ask him to stay, or you can tell him you have strong feelings for him and you’ll respect his boundaries.  Of those four options, is there one that appeals to you more than the others?”</p><p>“Well, definitely not full disclosure,” Harry said.  “I’d have to go with one of the in-between ones. I’ll just go crazy if I say and do nothing. </p><p>“So think more about those two in-between options, Harry,” Keith advised. “You always get to decide what to do. And only you can know whether it’s the right decision.”</p><p>“OK, I’ll think about it, and we can talk more about it next time,” Harry replied.  </p><p>*****</p><p>While Harry was in his therapy session, Draco was in Edinburgh negotiating with Astoria.  After considerable discussion they agreed to a shared custody arrangement whereby Scorpius would spend three months with each parent.  During the three-month period, the other parent would visit on a regular basis.  They agreed that Scorpius would stay with Astoria in Edinburgh through the end of July and begin a three-month stay with Draco starting at the beginning of August.  The couple had also come to an agreement on how they would divide communal property.  Astoria planned to claim what belonged to her from Malfoy Manor and teleport it to Edinburgh within the next three weeks. </p><p>Draco and Astoria decided to talk to Scorpius together about the new arrangement.  A precocious six-year-old little wizard, he listened intently to his parents’ words.  Draco and Astoria explained that they had done a lot of thinking and talking and decided that Astoria would continue living in Edinburgh with Aunt Isabella, and Draco would continue living in London with Harry Potter.  They assured Scorpius that they both loved him very much and both parents wanted to be with him, so they decided to share him.  So Scorpius would continue to live with his mother for now, and later in the summer he would go live with his father in London.  Draco and Astoria further explained that each parent would visit regularly when Scorpius was with the other parent.  If Scorpius was confused or distressed by the news, he did not show it.  Perhaps he had become accustomed to living in Edinburgh with Astoria, and having Draco visit from time to time, so it didn’t seem like much of a change.</p><p>Draco spent the rest of the afternoon playing with Scorpius and talking to him about all kinds of magical creatures—dragons, centaurs, erumpents, phoenixes, and many more.  Scorpius was fascinated by all kinds of magical beasts and already knew a great deal about them.  Draco could imagine Scorpius someday teaching the Care of Magical Creatures course at Hogwarts.  After a few hours Draco kissed his son goodbye.  He then talked briefly to Astoria about formalizing their divorce agreement, bade her farewell, and disapparated. </p><p>*****</p><p>Harry and Draco had both apparated home before suppertime. Kreacher and Roody served the wizards spaghetti Bolognese, which was one of Harry’s favorite comfort foods, accompanied by a side of broccoli and a garden salad.  A ten-year-old bottle of Barbaresco from the wine cellar complemented the meal perfectly.  After devouring the delicious meal, Harry and Draco retired to the drawing room where they continued sipping the delicious red wine.  </p><p>“Tell me about your day, Draco,” Harry said, sinking into a comfortable chair.<br/>
Draco plopped down in the matching chair facing Harry’s.  “I went to Edinburgh to meet with Astoria and spend time with Scorpius,” he said.</p><p>“And?” Harry prompted.</p><p>“It’s all settled,” Draco replied.  He proceeded to give Harry the details about the arrangements to which he and Astoria had agreed.  He also told Harry about his time with Scorpius that afternoon.  Harry smiled when he heard about Scorpius’s fascination with magical beasts.  “He’ll go far, that boy will,” Harry said.</p><p>“How about your day, Harry?” Draco asked.</p><p>“Not much to tell,” Harry replied.  “I had my weekly therapy appointment.”</p><p>“Do you want to talk about it?” Draco inquired.</p><p>In that moment Harry decided to be brave.  He thought about Keith’s slightly mocking question, “Scarier than facing Voldemort?”  Yes, Harry had faced many much scarier situations in his life.  So he said, “I talked to Keith about my feelings for you, Draco.” </p><p>Draco was at full alert now. “What did you say, Harry?”</p><p>“I told him that I have strong feelings for you and that I am attracted to you,” Harry said looking away from Draco.  “I told him that I was afraid to tell you because I didn’t want to lose your friendship.  I told him that I want you to stay with me here and it’s OK if you don’t feel the same way about me.  I don’t want to lose what we have.”  Harry was looking down at his feet.</p><p>“You won’t, Harry,” Draco said earnestly.  “I’m not going anywhere.  I have strong feelings for you too.  I already told you that I love and admire you. I’m just confused about what happens next.  I’ve never been with another man before.  Actually I’ve never felt like this before about anyone, except maybe Scorpius.”</p><p>“Like what?” Harry said, eyes moving up from his feet to meet Draco’s grey eyes.</p><p>“Like I never want us to be apart,” Draco said quietly.</p><p>Harry abruptly stood up, walked over to Draco, extending his hand and pulling him up from his chair.  Leading Draco to the sofa, Harry pushed him down onto it and climbed on top of him.  Crashing his lips into Draco’s, he kissed him passionately, urgently, releasing the intense longing that had been building inside him for so long.  Draco leaned into the kiss, exploring Harry’s mouth with his lips and tongue, reveling in the hardness of Harry’s body on top of him and drinking in his sweet scent, a mélange of sandalwood and lavender.  </p><p>Breaking from the kiss, Harry unbuttoned and opened Draco’s shirt, then slowly moved down his long, lean body, worshipping him all over with lips and tongue, while the Slytherin breathed hard and fast.  Harry marveled at the beauty of Draco’s toned body, the flawless porcelain skin, the whipcord muscles of a Quidditch seeker. Reaching Draco’s waist, Harry loosened the belt and Draco shucked off his jeans and boxers.  Before taking Draco’s long, hard cock in his mouth, Harry shucked off his own jeans and boxers, and then began deep-throating Draco’s cock while simultaneously pumping his own erection.  Draco’s breath became heavier and faster and before long he started to gasp.  </p><p>“I’m gonna come, Harry,” he shouted.</p><p>Lifting his head up for a second, Harry yelled back, “Go for it!” then immediately returned to his task. </p><p>Draco then shot his load, hitting the back of Harry’s throat.  Harry stroked himself to climax a few seconds later, spurting his load onto the sofa.  He then collapsed onto the carpet, lying on his back, panting heavily.</p><p>After he had calmed down a bit, Harry ventured, “You doing OK, Draco?” </p><p>Draco laughed. “I should say so.  You’re talented, Harry.”</p><p>“Well, I’ve had a bit of practice,” Harry said with a chuckle.</p><p>“How about you? Did you come?” Draco asked.</p><p>“Yeah, I got myself off while sucking you off.  It was hot,” Harry replied.</p><p>“I feel kind of selfish, just receiving and not giving,” Draco admitted.</p><p>“Don’t,” Harry said, “I truly believe it’s better to give than receive.  Besides this doesn’t have to be a one-time occurrence, unless you want it to be.” </p><p>“Absolutely not,” Draco said. “I’m definitely up for more. And next time I want to give as well as receive.”</p><p>“Good, it's a deal,” Harry said with a smile.  He picked up his wand then and cast a tergeo spell to clean up the sofa.</p><p>The wizards were a little shy with each other after their first sexual encounter and found conversation slightly awkward.  But they muddled through and mutually agreed that they both preferred to sleep in their own beds that night.  They did, however, share a tight embrace and a passionate kiss before bidding each other good night and retiring to their separate bedrooms.</p>
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<a name="section0018"><h2>18. Harry Talks to Hermione and Ron</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Harry and Draco's relationship continues to develop.  Harry visits Hermione and Ron and tells them about his new relationship status.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Harry’s and Draco’s emotional and sexual relationship evolved quickly after their first sexual encounter.  Within a week the wizards no longer felt awkward or shy about expressing physical affection towards each other.  As they grew more familiar with each other’s bodies, the satisfaction and excitement they derived from their sexual intimacy intensified.  Both wizards wanted to give as much pleasure to each other as possible and were more than willing to explore magical and non-magical means to achieve that end. </p><p>Harry was incandescently happy, scarcely believing that the wizard he had fantasized about for so long was actually his lover now.  Hardly able to contain his excitement, Harry would walk around beaming and humming happy tunes to himself.  Several of his Ministry colleagues observed that the Head Auror appeared especially energetic and upbeat lately.  Hermione even commented that Harry looked like he had been hit with a cheering charm. </p><p>And for the first time in his life Draco thought that the notion of soulmates might not be such hogwash after all.  Looking back on their Hogwarts days, Draco reflected that their obsessive dislike of each other years ago had, in a very odd way, foreshadowed their strong love for each other now.   He could not imagine a life for himself that did not include an intense relationship with Harry Potter.  </p><p>The time soon came to tell others about their relationship status.  One evening when Harry and Draco were lying in bed, Harry said, “I think it’s time for me to tell my friends and family about our relationship. You’re so important to me, as are they.  I want you to get to know them, and for them to get to know you.” </p><p>Draco felt a wave of anxiety rising in him.  He took a moment before asking, “How do you think they’ll take the news that you’re in a relationship with a Malfoy?”</p><p>Harry sighed and said, “It may be a little rough at first, but I know they’ll come around.  They’re good, fair-minded people.  Once they get to know you, they’ll come to love you as I do.”</p><p>“Are you sure about that?” Draco said, skeptical.</p><p>“Yes, I’m sure,” said Harry with conviction.  “We’ll start with Ron and Hermione.   I know your relationship with ‘Mione has improved since you started working at the Ministry.  Ron may be a little more difficult, but he’ll follow Hermione’s lead, he always does.  I’ll talk to them first before we plan anything more formal, OK?”</p><p>“Well, if you’re sure,” Draco said, still sounding doubtful.</p><p>“We’ll proceed slowly,” Harry said in an attempt to reassure Draco.  “I’ll talk to Ron and Hermione soon, and then we’ll arrange a visit to Grangeley.  After that we can talk about you meeting Ginny and my kids.  I definitely want you to be a part of their lives.”</p><p>“OK,” Draco replied.  “I’ll let you take the lead on this.”</p><p>“How about you, Draco?” Harry asked. “Any of your friends and family that should know about us?”</p><p>Draco reflected for a moment and then said, “Pansy is the first person that comes to mind.  She’ll probably be cool with it, if a little surprised.  Astoria and Scorpius, of course.  Scorpius already loves you, and I expect Astoria will be amused by this development. I don’t imagine that Blaise will react well.  But Pike will react better than Blaise.  I dread telling my mother--she won’t react well, I can guarantee. You’re probably close to her worst nightmare—a half-blood gay wizard.  The only thing worse would be a total mudblood gay wizard or a Muggle.”</p><p>Harry laughed.  “Well, I’ll leave it up to you whether to tell your mother about us.  But maybe we can start with Pansy if you think she’ll be cool with it.  We can slowly build up to the more difficult people to come out to.”</p><p>“Sounds like a plan,” Draco said.  “Harry?”</p><p>“Yes, my love?”</p><p>“I do want to get to know the Weasleys, I really do, but I’m pretty nervous about it,” Draco admitted.  “I haven’t exactly been the nicest to them over the years.”</p><p>“I know,” Harry said, “but they’re forgiving people.  Maybe if you find a way to say you’re sorry for things you said or did in the past, that would help.  Think about it, OK?”</p><p>“OK, I will,” Draco replied.</p><p>*****</p><p>Within a couple of days Harry had scheduled a visit to Grangeley.  After suppertime on a beautiful evening in mid July he apparated in the parlor of Ron’s and Hermione’s lovely home.  The couple were seated comfortably on the sofa, awaiting his arrival.  After hugs were exchange, Harry sat down in a plush chair facing his best friends.</p><p>“So what’s up, Harry?” Ron asked.  “You told ‘Mione you had something important to talk to us about.”</p><p>“Yeah,” Harry said with a smile.  “It’s happy news, but I know it will come as a bit of a shock.”</p><p>He paused, and Ron said, “Well, don’t keep us in suspense.  What is it?”</p><p>“It’s about Draco and me,” Harry replied. “We’re together now.”</p><p>“Together? What do you mean ‘together’?  I know you’re still living together.”  Hermione asked with a puzzled look.</p><p>“I don’t know how to describe it,” Harry said haltingly.  “Partners? Boyfriends? Lovers?”</p><p>“No way!” Ron exclaimed. “You’re taking the piss out of us!”</p><p>“No, Ron, it’s true,” Harry said, looking directly into Ron’s wide eyes.</p><p>“Holy shit. Malfoy. I don’t believe it,” Ron muttered, shaking his head.</p><p>“I’m speechless for once, Harry,” Hermione said.  “When-er-how did this happen?”</p><p>Harry tried to explain.  “After he moved in with me, we started getting emotionally close.  We got to know each other well, and we came to enjoy our time together.  We would talk about anything and everything.  And then we were there for each other when we each needed support.  I was there for him when his dad died and at his dad’s funeral, and he was there for me when I was dealing with a traumatic memory.  Before I knew it I was in love with him.  And apparently he had strong feelings for me too.” </p><p>Harry took a momentary pause, then added with a grin, “So then we started being physical and one thing led to another.  I won’t go into details.” </p><p>“Please don’t,” Ron pleaded, continuing to shake his head.  “I still can’t believe it.  Harry and Malfoy in love. It’s absurd, that’s what it is.”</p><p>“Ron, please,” Hermione chided in her most reasonable tone. “This is obviously important to Harry, and we have to be supportive.”</p><p>Then looking directly at Harry, she said, “Congratulations, Harry.  I can tell that Draco makes you very happy, and that’s what counts.  Now I know why you’ve had such a spring in your step lately, and why I said you looked like you were hit with a cheering charm.  It’s all Draco’s doing then?”</p><p>“Thanks, Hermione,” Harry said, “Yes, Draco deserves all the credit for my improved mood.”</p><p>“Ron?” Hermione prompted.</p><p>Ron took a deep breath and said grudgingly, “Well, so long as he makes you happy, then he can’t be all bad.  But this is going to take a lot of getting used to.”</p><p>“I know, Ron,” Harry said in a conciliatory tone. “But for my sake please give Draco a chance.  He’s not the same person he was at Hogwarts.  If he were, I wouldn’t have fallen in love with him.  And he’s sorry for things he did and said in the past.  I know he is.  I need my friends and family to accept him and to support our relationship.  So please try for my sake?”</p><p>“Of course, Harry,” Ron said. “Since it means that much to you.  I’ll do whatever it takes to like the git.”</p><p>Harry smiled and said, “Thanks, Ron. You’ve been my best mate forever.  You and my boyfriend have to get along.” Ron grunted his reply.</p><p>Hermione then asked, “So how can we support your relationship, Harry?”</p><p>Harry reflected for a moment, then said, “Well, if Draco and I can come here sometime and visit with you two and the kids, that would be a great start.  And then maybe you can somehow help make introducing Draco to the rest of the family a little easier?  I mean I will figure out how to introduce Draco to Ginny and my kids.  But I’ll probably need some help introducing him to Molly and Arthur and Ron’s brothers.”</p><p>“Sure, Harry,” Hermione replied, “We’ll have you and Draco over for a meal in the next couple of weeks, and then we’ll work on introducing him to the other Weasleys.”  She then looked over at her husband and prompted, “Ron?”</p><p>Ron responded with, “Yes, I’ll always have your back, Harry.”</p><p>“Thank you,” Harry said to his best friends. “Your support means everything to me.”</p><p>The conversation then shifted to less emotionally charged topics—Hugo’s and Rose’s progress on their studies, recent business at Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes, and the latest staff changes at the Ministry.  </p><p>After visiting with Ron and Hermione for a couple of hours, Harry hugged his friends goodbye and disapparated back to 12 Grimmauld Place.</p>
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<a name="section0019"><h2>19. Visits to Malfoy Manor and Grangeley</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Harry and Draco visit Malfoy Manor to prepare for the arrival of Scorpius, and visit with Hermione and Ron at Grangeley.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>During the last two weeks of July, Harry and Draco were busy getting ready for the arrival of Scorpius.  At breakfast one morning Harry raised with Draco the possibility of temporarily relocating to Malfoy Manor.</p><p>“I know you told me there were dark memories there,” Harry said, “but maybe we can dispel those dark memories and start creating happy ones.  I keep thinking about the beautiful garden, the fresh air, and the wide, open spaces which would be so good for Scorpius.  Besides, the manor will be his one day, so it makes sense for him to spend time there now.  And I’m sure that Astoria and Narcissa would prefer visiting Scorpius at the manor rather than here.  The only concern I have is whether your mother will have a problem with me living there with you.”</p><p>Draco was silent for several moments, considering the suggestion.  He then said, “I like the idea, Harry, but are you sure? Do you really want to live in Wiltshire?  I know you love London.”</p><p>“Three months in the country sounds lovely,” Harry replied. “And it’ll be heaven being there with you and Scorpius.  But what about your mother?”</p><p>“I’ll deal with Narcissa, don’t worry,” Draco said. </p><p>The wizards then made a list of tasks they needed to accomplish before the arrival of Scorpius.  On a Saturday they apparated at Malfoy Manor and proceeded to walk through the huge mansion, room by room.  When Draco had moved in with Harry at 12 Grimmauld Place, his house-elves Jiffy and Skeeter had stayed behind to maintain the residence and garden.  Everything appeared to be in good order.</p><p>Harry and Draco chose the bedroom they would share, as well as the bedroom that would be Scorpius’s.  They cast a few charms, including Herbivicus and Colovaria, to enliven and brighten up the rooms.  Although all evidence of dark magic had been removed from Malfoy Manor by the Ministry after the Second Wizarding War, there were several objects remaining in the mansion that conjured painful memories for Draco.  With Harry’s help, Draco decided which objects to vanish with an Evanesco spell and which objects to transport to be stored in an unused room in 12 Grimmauld Place.  </p><p>The last task the wizards had to accomplish that day was to deal with the cellar, where prisoners of the Dark Lord had been held during the Second Wizarding War.  This room held painful memories for both Harry and Draco, but they were determined to illuminate the dark space and dispel all distressing memories. The first thing Harry did upon entering the cellar was to cast a Fenestrato spell, creating windows at the tops of all four cellar walls.  As the light streamed in, the atmosphere in the room was instantly transformed, immediately feeling less ominous and depressing.  Harry and Draco continued to cast spells and charms, brightening up the cellar with color, life, and light.   When they had finished, they looked at each other and smiled.  </p><p>“It’s a completely different space now,” Draco said with satisfaction.  “I can even see Scorpius playing with his collection of magical creatures down here.”</p><p>“Let’s take one final step to cleanse the dark energy in the room—let’s cast our patronuses,” Harry suggested.   The wizards agreed on a joyful shared memory—the previous weekend they had flown together for fun in pursuit of a golden snitch, recapturing their youth as Hogwarts seekers.  It was the  perfect memory for their purpose.  Harry and Draco simultaneously raised their wands, and within moments the cellar was illuminated by their glimmering patronuses—Draco’s stunning white peacock and Harry’s majestic stag.  </p><p>A blissful feeling permeated the room and remained, even after the wizards had lowered their wands and their shining patronuses had faded.  Harry and Draco agreed that they had accomplished all their tasks at the manor, and all that remained was to teleport their own and Scorpius’s belongings before moving in on August 1st. </p><p>*****</p><p>Hermione kept her promise, and the wizards were invited to dine at Grangeley the following Wednesday.  Draco was actually dreading his first genuine social interaction with Harry’s best friends.  Harry tried to reassure him that everything would go smoothly, but Draco couldn’t stop thinking about the horrible things he had said to Ron and Hermione when they were all at Hogwarts.  Still, he was determined to go through with this difficult evening for Harry’s sake. </p><p>The wizards apparated in the Grangely parlor at the appointed time.  Hugo and Rose ran up to Harry, demanding hugs and welcoming him with shouts of “Uncle Harry.”  Harry then introduced the children to Draco, saying, “Hugo and Rose, I’d like you to meet my partner, Draco.  Draco, this is Hugo and Rose, my godchildren.” </p><p>Draco smiled and said, “Hello, Hugo, hello, Rose, I’m very pleased to meet you.”</p><p>“Hello, Draco,” the children replied.  </p><p>Grinning at Harry, Draco said, “Harry, you’re so very lucky to have such good-looking godchildren.  Shall we give them their present now?”</p><p>Harry pretended to deliberate for a moment, while the children stared at him expectantly.  Then he smiled and produced a Muggle game called “Gnomes at Night.”  He figured that they probably already owned most of the magical games and toys available at Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes, so a Muggle game was a safe bet. </p><p>Handing it to the children, he said, “This is a Muggle game from Draco and me.  You two figure out how to play it, and next time Draco and I come, you can teach us, OK?”</p><p>“OK! Thank you, Uncle Harry, thank you, Draco!” the children shouted and ran upstairs with the game. </p><p>At that moment Hermione and Ron entered the parlor.  Hermione rushed over and gave both wizards a warm welcome.  She hugged one, then the other, giving each a gentle kiss on the cheek.  “So glad this worked out for you two.”</p><p>Harry could tell that Ron was a little less welcoming than his wife but was making an effort.  He greeted Harry with a handshake and a one-armed hug, then extended his hand to Draco and said, “Welcome, Malfoy, it’s been a while.  Heard you been keeping my good mate company.  How’s life?”</p><p>Draco smiled and replied, “Hello, Ron.  Life is good.  Yes, Harry and I are co-habitating, you might say.”</p><p>After greetings were exchanged, Hermione suggested that before supper they all sit out on the patio to enjoy the garden and the gorgeous summer weather.  Hermione brought out goblets of delicious elf-made wine.  It was a picture-perfect midsummer day, the garden was a riot of color and fragrance, and the three Gryffindors began to feel very relaxed and peaceful.  Draco, however, was unable to relax, feeling tense and ashamed about things he said and did in the past to his hosts.   </p><p>Eventually he could no longer contain himself and felt compelled to speak. He said, “Hermione and Ron, it was very gracious of you to invite me to your lovely home given my past behavior.  I need to tell you how sorry I am for offending and insulting you in the past, and I hope you will forgive me.  I‘m not the same person I was years ago, and I hope you will give me the chance to prove that. If not for my sake, for Harry’s sake, because we are together now, and I want to be on good terms with his best friends.”</p><p>Hermione smiled kindly at Draco and said, “Of course, Draco.  I forgave you a long time ago.  And I know you’re not the same person you were back at Hogwarts because if you were, Harry wouldn’t have fallen in love with you.  He said as much last time he was here.”  She laughed then, and that drew a smile from Draco.</p><p>Ron then said, “I accept your apology, Draco.  We’ll start over with a blank slate.”</p><p>Both Harry and Draco were aware that Ron had called him “Draco” and not “Malfoy” for the very first time.</p><p>“Thank you both,” Draco said with sincerity.  “That means a lot to me.”</p><p>Recognizing that Draco might need some help to get his mind off his past transgressions, Harry interjected, “Cariad, tell Ron and Hermione about Scorpius coming to live with us.” </p><p>This was a topic about which Draco could speak enthusiastically and at length.  After explaining his custody arrangement with Astoria, he said that Scorpius would come to live with the wizard couple soon and the three of them would live at Malfoy Manor for three months.  He described the changes that he and Harry had made to the manor.  He produced a wizard photo of Scorpius in which the six-year-old was sharing his knowledge of magical creatures. </p><p>Hermione looked at the photograph fondly and exclaimed, “What an adorable little wizard.  And obviously very smart.”  Draco beamed with pride.</p><p>Ron said, “He looks like he’s about the same age as Rose, six or seven?  You must bring him by sometime for a play date with Rose and Hugo.”</p><p>Draco replied, “He’ll turn seven in February, and he’d be thrilled to meet Rose and Hugo.  He doesn’t get to spend much time with other kids.” </p><p>The party spent the rest of the evening enjoying excellent food, delicious elf-wine, and fluid, friendly conversation.  After Harry and Draco had thanked their hosts, bid them farewell, and apparated back at 12 Grimmauld Place, they pronounced the visit pleasant and successful. </p><p>“It was a good start,” Draco admitted.  “I feel more ready now to meet the rest of your adopted family.”</p><p>“I’m glad, cariad,” Harry replied. “And I’m proud of you for apologizing for past behavior.  I could tell that won Ron over.”</p><p>“Well, I needed to do it,” Draco said. “I have owed them an apology for years. It was weighing on me—a debt that had to be paid.  And they were so gracious.  Your friends are awesome, Harry.”</p><p>Harry smiled happily. “I’m glad you think so, and I hope in time you will consider them your friends too.”</p>
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<a name="section0020"><h2>20. Epilogue</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The wizards were getting ready for Albus Potter’s birthday on August 27.  Harry, Draco, and Scorpius had been comfortably ensconced in Malfoy Manor since the beginning of August, enjoying the beauty of the English countryside in midsummer.  Scorpius loved living with his two dads, who doted on him and took turns keeping him engaged in fun and educational activities.  Draco loved watching Harry and Scorpius interact. He would gaze fondly at his lover and his son as Harry enchanted Scorpius with tales about his encounters with magical beasts, and Scorpius would listen enrapt and wide-eyed.</p><p>After moving into Malfoy Manor at the beginning of August, Harry, Draco, and Scorpius visited Devon a few times so that Draco and Scorpius could meet Harry’s children.  In a private conversation Harry had explained to Ginny that he and Draco were now a couple.  Her initial reaction was similar to her brother’s—shock and disbelief—but she eventually came around and treated Draco with civility.  Harry hoped that eventually she would act more warmly towards his lover.  </p><p>Scorpius and Albus got along famously from the beginning of their acquaintance.  The two little wizards were only a year apart in age and loved playing together.  They would rush around on their toy brooms, pretending to fly and creating elaborate fantasies in which they were the heroes in the midst of thrilling and perilous adventures. </p><p>During mid to late summer the wizards also visited the Burrows.  Hermione and Ron had paved the way for a cordial reception at the Weasley homestead.  Molly and Arthur extended a warm welcome to Harry, Draco, and Scorpius.  Draco was surprised and grateful that the Weasleys accepted him and his son with open arms.  He had not expected them to be so hospitable and kind to someone named Malfoy.  Molly prepared a large feast for them, and Arthur expressed an avid interest in Draco’s work in the Department of Magical Artefacts at the Ministry.</p><p>Harry continued to make good progress in his therapy sessions with Keith and Hilda.  Starting in August he began working through his grief about losing Remus, Tonks and Sirius.  This was difficult and painful work, but Harry was nothing if not courageous and tackled it head on.  He knew that eventually he would have to address his terrifying near death experiences, but he knew that Keith would guide him towards that point gradually and with sensitivity.  Harry also knew that Draco would provide whatever emotional support he required.</p><p>As word got around the British community of wizards and witches that Harry and Draco were now a gay couple, the wizards attracted even more attention than before.  The magical tabloids ran sensational stories about the relationship between the Boy Who Lived and the former Death Eater, and Harry and Draco had to lay low for a while to avoid the publicity.  But they had each other for support, as well as a sense of humor about it all, which helped them to survive whatever life threw their way.</p><p>The wizards’ love for each other grew stronger and deeper with each passing day.  Every night after tucking Scorpius in for the night and reading the little wizard a bedtime story, Harry and Draco would snuggle together in the drawing room, reflecting on how lucky they were to have fallen in love with each other.  And every night before going to sleep, Harry would kiss Draco and say, "I love you, Malfoy." And Draco would reply, "I love you back, Potter."</p>
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